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"Were you angry at hiood question, she had to adood answer She wished she’d been angry at hi herself But she’d given him permission, and he’d taken her at her word Who was to blame? Maybe nobody
"Back then I was onlyfor me that day I felt so stupid I had one job as his submissive--say my safe word if and when I wanted the scene to stop That would have stopped it One word, and I couldn’t even do that right It tookSøren, he was more careful with me after And e had anal sex the second ti Like the best sex we’d ever had I think he was trying toin the shower, I think maybe"
"What?" Kyrie asked
Elle ssley had told her about his first time with Søren on the forest floor He fucked the life out of ht, there was only blood My blood And I hope God is as understanding as you two like to tell et to Heaven and God wants to wipe ht and take away the blood and the pain, I’ll turn on ht into Hell just to keep the memory
"Søren had one other lover before ot who he ith for a second If so, he never forgot again And I never forgot, either But that didn’t stop ain for the next teeks until it was the only word I knew At night before bed, when I woke up the next , before lunch, after lunch and into my coffee It’s a miracle I didn’t introduce myself to people that way by mistake ‘Hi, I’m Jabberwocky, nice to meet you’"
"Why did you pick that word?"
"I loved Lewis Carroll’s books as a kid So did Søren It was so we had in common, and if you compare his childhood toin coht they were funny But he When Søren was five years old, his father sent hi school He said he loved Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass because he wanted to believe there was another world out there he could get to by stepping through adown a rabbit hole But he didn’t want a Wonderland with Mad Hatters and March Hares He wanted to see his ain, and he didn’t kno to find her He’d walk past a limpse of his own blond hair and he wouldhe’d think for a second it was her waiting just around the corner of the world inside the mirror"
Elle closed her eyes and let herself love the lonely little boy Søren had been once upon a time
"So Jabberwocky wasto both of us," Elle said, clearing the knot froh
"Did you ever use it?"
"Once ht I left Søren once and for all But that’s a longer story than this one and you need to get back to your rooet up soon"
"I don’t want to go I want to stay with you all night"
"I know," Elle said, kissing Kyrie on top of her head "I know that feeling But if you want another night with ht"
With obvious reluctance, Kyrie rolled up Elle saw her wince
"How are you?" she asked Kyrie "Are you sore?"
"Sore," she said, nodding "And happy Are you happy?"