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Eleanor

One Night with the King

By Eleanor Schreiber

Tonight was --how to curtsy, how to simper, how to dance, hohimper They dressed me and pressed me and irls talking all around , what they’d do to iirl said

"I have written hian," said another girl

Everyone had looked at that girl like she was an idiot She was an idiot It was ancient Persia Kings didn’t wear cardigans Cardigans hadn’t even been invented yet

I spentI smelled like orchids, looked like a princess and had no unwanted body hair

Then Hegai came for me

"Are you ready?" he asked

"I think so"

"Are you taking anything with you for the king?"

"I have a hy?"

"No Sorry I have a hyai left ’s chamber

I opened the door

At first I didn’t see anybody All I saas cha couches, tall sexy plants with big sexy flowers bloo out how sexy you look in it And it had the biggest, sexiest bed I’d ever seen in old pillows and those fancy bed curtains only people in the past had before central heating existed It’s good to live in the past It’s sexier here

The big door to the balcony was open so I stuck e staring out on the kingdoht the palace was beautiful, I thought the kingdoht jeere beautiful But they were nothing co

He had blond hair and was so tall I kneas probably doing it for attention He wore jeans and a white T-shirt I thought jeans hadn’t been invented yet but then I realized they had been invented because they looked so good on hiun to my head and told douns hadn’t been invented yet

And then I’d point at the king

"Hi as he turned around to look atthis bizarre fantasy about a guy holding a gun to my head"

"Guns haven’t been invented yet"