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She sat quietly, staring at the shell-shaped stone in her hand, and tried to meditate as she had seen Creb do She knew she was considered unusual because she had a Cave Lion toteht much about it before She reached under her wrap and felt the scars of the four parallel lines on her leg Why would a Cave Lion choose me, anyway? He’s a powerful toteirl? Thereto use it Why did I pick up that old sling that Broud threay? None of the women would have touched it What would make me do it? Did my totem want me to? Does he want me to learn to hunt? Only men hunt, but my tote totem and he wants me to hunt

“O Great Cave Lion, the ways of the spirits are strange to ave ain, then she took the amulet from around her neck, pried loose the knot that held the small pouch closed, and put the fossil cast into the leather bag beside the piece of red ochre Tying it tightly again, she slipped it back over her head and noticed the difference in weight It seeht to her totem’s sanction of her decision

Her guilt was gone She was supposed to hunt; her totem wanted her to It didn’t ht He left his clan even though everyone said it rong I think he did find a better place where Ice Mountain couldn’t reach him I think he started a whole new clan Hetotems are hard to live with He says they test you toHe says that’s why I almost died before Iza found me I wonder if Durc’s toteain?

A test can be hard, though What if I’ tested? What hard thing will ht about as hard in her life and it suddenly came to her

“Broud! Broud is estured to herself What could be harder than having to face a whole winter with Broud? But if I’m worthy, if I can do it, my totem will let me hunt

There was a difference in the way Ayla walked when she returned to the cave, and Iza noticed it, though she couldn’t quite say as different about it It wasn’t less proper, it just seemed easier, not as tense, and there was a look of acceptance on the girl’s face when she saw Broud approaching Not resignation, just acceptance But it was Creb who noticed the extra bulge in her amulet

As the winter closed in, they were both glad to see her return to norh she was often tired, when she played with Uba her suessed she had con from her toteave hile, but he kneas not only necessary to bend to Broud’s will, she had to stop fighting it She had to learn self-control, too

During the winter that began her eighth year, Ayla becaht, undeveloped lines of a girl, without the least hint of the changes to co cold season that Ayla put her childhood aside

At times her life was so unbearable, she wasn’t sure if she wanted it to continue Soh texture of the bare rock wall above her, she wished she could go back to sleep and never wake up But when she thought she couldn’t stand it any longer, she clutched her aave her the patience to endure another day And each day lived through brought her just that much closer to the tirass and sea breezes, and she could roaain

Like the woolly rhinoceros, whose spirit he called his totem, Broud could be as stubborn as he could be unpredictably vicious Characteristic of the Clan, once he settled on a particular course of action, he persisted with unswerving dedication, and Broud dedicated hi Ayla in line Her daily ordeal of clouts and curses and constant harassment was obvious to the rest of the clan Many felt she did deserve soths to which Broud went

Brun was still concerned that Broud was letting the girl provoke hi man controlled his fury, the leader felt it was a definite improvement But Brun hoped to see the son of his mate pursue a more moderate approach on his own and decided to let the situation run its course As the winter wore on, he began to develop a certain grudging respect for the strange girl, the sa when she had endured the beatings of her mate

Like Iza, Ayla was setting an example of womanly behavior She endured, without complaint, as a woman should When she paused momentarily to clutch her amulet, Brun, and many of the others, took it as an indication of her reverence for the spiritual forces so fearfully important to the Clan It added to her feminine stature

The a to believe in; she did revere the spiritual forces, as she understood the her If she proved worthy, she could learn to hunt The ered her, the in to teach herself when spring ca to be better than Broud, better even than Zoug She was going to be the best sling-hunter in the clan, though no one would know it but her That was the thought she clung to It solidified in hershafts of ice that formed at the top of the entrance to the cave where war terew, like the heavy translucent curtains of ice, all through the winter

Though it wasn’t intentional, she was already training herself Despite the fact that it brought her into closer contact with Broud, she found herself interested and drawn to theearlier hunts or discussing strategy for future ones She found ways to work near the told tales of hunting with the sling She revived her interest in Zoug and her feenuine affection for the old hunter He was like Creb in a way, proud and stern, and glad for a little attention and warirl

Zoug was not blind to her interest as he recounted past glories when he was second-in-command as Grod was now She was an appreciative, if silent, audience and always dean to seek Vorn out to explain soirl would find a way to sit nearby if she could, though he affected not to notice If she enjoyed his tales, what harm could there be in that?

If I were younger, Zoug thought, and still a provider, I ht take her as a mate, when she becoly as she is, she’s going to have so, and respectful I have kin in other clans If I’, I’ll speak for her She may not want to stay here after Broud becomes leader, not that it matters what she wants, but I wouldn’t blaone to the next world before that happens Zoug never forgot Broud’s attack on hiht the future leader was unreasonably hard on the girl for whom he had developed an affection She did deserve to be disciplined, but there were limits and Broud went beyond them She was never disrespectful to him; it took an older, wiser man to kno to handle woo, I’ll send a ly, he mused

As difficult as it was for Ayla, it wasn’t all bad Activities were at a slower pace and there were fewer chores to do Even Broud could find only so , he got a little bored; there wasn’t any fight in her anymore, and the intensity of his harassment slackened And there

was another reason that Ayla began to find the winter more bearable

At first, in an effort to find valid reasons for her to stay within the boundaries of Creb’s fire, Iza decided to begin training her in the preparation and application of the herbs and plants Ayla had been gathering Ayla found herself fascinated with the art of healing The girl’s avid interest soon involved Iza in a regular prograun sooner, as she becahter’s mind worked

If Ayla had been her true child, Iza would only have had to reet her accustoe Uba was born with, and Ayla’s conscious o over the same material many tiht Iza pulled information from her memories as well as her own experience and was surprised, herself, at the wealth of knowledge she had She’d never had to think about it before; it was just there when she needed it So Ayla what she knew, or even enough to make her an adequate ed and Iza was deterhter an assured status in the clan The lessons went on daily