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"Totally awful," I tell her

Best Sex Ever

"Hawke is selfish," she adds "Remember that He thinks about no one but himself"

"Selfish as they come," I murmur

Excepthe's given his ti a rock-solid means of support

"Listen, honey," Avery says briskly "Rob just ca"

"Okay," I say as I stand fro to hop in the shower and hit the bed early I've got to train a client toame so I'll have to be at the arena by three PM"

"Love you," Avery says "Talk in a few days?"

"Yup Your turn to call"

"Got it, toots Later"

"Later," I say quietly, and disconnect the call I rub the end of the cellphone overto rekindle anything with Haould not be a smart oing hooing, but I' term Besides, no matter how combustible we may still be in the sex departh to be with someone And it's been abundantly clear, past the sex and maybe a timid fondness for an old friend, we don't have ether

I take an extralong shower, relishing the actual ti about Dad being in the hospital and ht up onmy hair, I put on a pair of old Penn State sweatpants and a white tank top While I'd noretup, and would just shed the sweatpants prior to clio watch sooes on under the tank top, because as ood roo requirements that have to be maintained I wear a bra at all times in his presence and he promises to never come out of his room in just his boxer shorts

Putting my hair up in a loose ponytail, I decide I'll do rab some Pe

rfectly Pearly Pink nail polish from the cabinet underneath the sink He'll probably want to watch sports, which is fine byevery day I have with hiTV

The minute I open the bathroo than nize it as Hawke's With one foot across the threshold of the bathroom and one foot still inside, I freezea momentary lapse in motion so I can contemplate what to do

I can jet into o on just as well in either place

Or I can go out there, because curiosity has the better ofHawke

I wince, duck h no one can see, and take a step into the hallway Despite everything I just promised Avery, and despite all the ways in which our history has fucked both of us up, I can't help but want to see him

But I'll play it cool

Act surprised to see him

Sit on the opposite end of the couch from him and pretend indifference as I paint my nails

I'll reinforce to him that all we'll ever share is apast that is justwell, in the past

Chapter 17

Hawke

I hear the bathroom door open behind me and can't help the tension in my shoulders This is either a smart s as they are with Vale The last two days it's been gnawing at my insidesan unrealized epiphany that keepsI purposely visited Dave at the hospital early yesterdayto avoid a run-in with Vale It was cowardly, but until I could process as really happening inside ame to concentrate on

But when I woke up this ht with a shorthanded goal compliments of yours truly, a clarity that was more crystal than a Waterford vase see I knehat needed to be done where Vale was concerned

I didn't dwell on the implications, I didn't hesitate in my actions In fact, I called Dave once he was home from the hospital and told him what my plan was WellI told him part of what my plan was The other part a father doesn't need to know about his daughter