page16 (1/2)

Chapter 10

Vale

The ride home from Hawke's party is tense and silent Todd sits beside ht Hawke's inference loud and clear, and I iine he's all kinds of confused

Join the club

My dad has no clue what's going on, but he knew by my sudden demand we leave and the silence that lays heavy between Todd andI suppose I'll have to fill him in later after Todd and I talk

I could strangle Hawke for outing us to Todd While sin this world I want is to hurt Todd He doesn't deserve it, not with the way he's already been feeling about our relationship

As I pull into the parking lot offrom the anticipation of confrontation I hate it, always have I have no clue what to even say to Todd, and even less of a clue as to what I really want, but I suppose it's tiure out what the hell is going on with me I need to either commit to Todd or cut him loosewhich, apparently, is what Hawke thinks I'm destined to do

He calledI'm disloyal to love and trust

He called ht, but he's also a hypocrite While I th of e had all those years ago, he's the one that slammed the door on us perive et my lesson on the consequences of impetuosity

I pull into a spot close to our outside stairwell, andthe door before I can turn the car off

"I' to hit the bed I'll see you kids in the "

" 'Night, Dad," I ine He closes the door and the overhead la the car into seht on the stairwell is broken

My in with Todd, but I'm lost without a cos off with Hawke, I was just so sure of myself Unforeseen circumstances threw me for a loop, but I came to a rapid decision to alter the course of ranted, was rief and terror--there truly was no option other than to part ith Hawke

Things aren't so easy where Todd's concerned, and the only thingup my current relationship is one bitter ex-boyfriend who doesn't seem to want to share any responsibility for the demise of e had

Just ironic

"So, you want to tell looer seat

"Just a friend," I say quietly, but I intend to give hihback in Sydney We dated"

"For how long?"

"Four years; started when I was sixteen years old"

Todd coughs, clears his throat "Why did you break up?"

I don't answer him, because I can't It's not a story that I feel co with him, especially when I haven't ever shared the reason with anyone other than Avery and my father

"The reason is private," I say carefully as I turn in the seat slightly to face hio Hawke and I went our separate ways and haven't spoken with each other until we both landed here at the Cold Fury He's angry at ht Hell, he does have the right, but I'h, because I can't afford to get caught up in the negativity of it all I don't have room for that in my life"

"And do you have room for me in your life?" he asks as his hand reaches out to take mine

"Of course I do," I say automatically Almost like a robot

And I realize that's a true statement I do have rooht question The one that would haveis if I want him in my life That, I'm not so sure about

And that's because Hawke cos for me

He's dredged up sofrom it all

Anger, bitterness, yearning, sadness, desire