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She groped at the scarf now constricting her neck and jerked it free She unzipped her jogging jacket so that she could draw in a deep breath

Leah traced the scar slashed across her palm It had been a defensive wound, just as Alex had said

She never re the knife Even now, the attack only cah the air The prick of a blade against her throat The softness of Philip’s final words I’m sorry

What really lingered with her were the e fear Pain Weakness

She dug her fingers in her hair, li She wanted to sleep Needed to sleep

Leah rose fros made her way to the bedroom, where the rumpled comforter of her unmade bed waited She crawled between the cool sheets and curled on her side, pulling the blankets over her head Was she ever going to feel safe?

She closed her eyes, wanting only to sleep for a few hours to escape the horror of what she’d seen today Breathe in Breathe out She reached for the bottle of sleeping pills she hadn’t used inone now felt akin to failure She shouldn’t need it But she did Cutting one in half, she popped it in her rabbed hold of her

She wasn’t sure how long she drifted just above the waves of deep sleep It felt good to drift Weightless Light Not afraid, if only just for a moment

The whispered song tugged on her and brought her deeper to a sleeping no-man’s-land where she couldn’t separate reality from the past and the unreal

The gentlest touch of a finger skinored it But not her

Even with her syste in her head The only person who had ever sung to her had been Philip

A rush of adrenaline surged through her body Her eyes popped open, and for a ainst the day’s diaze Silence Her eyes adjusted as her heart pounded against her ribs and she restrained her panic She glanced at the clock on the nightstand: 5:21

“Damn” She moved to the bathroom, where she stripped off her clothes She turned on the shower and brushed her teeth as she waited for the spray to heat up before she stepped in and allowed the warmth to wash over her very chilled bones

Tipping her head back, she allowed the water to slush over her naked breasts, which still bore the scars of the attack She traced the thin pinkish scar that slid across the top of her left breast The doctors had said the scars on her chest would be the worst Thin tissue had been the reason

“Philip is dead,” she muttered “He can’t hurt you”

Shutting off the water, she grabbed a towel She dried her hair, ared mirror clean and did what she rarely did any each of the twenty-three with her fingertip No longer pink and raised, they had whitened over time and faded Just like her memories should have done, but would not

Finally, she slipped on a robe before padding into her room The blinds were closed, just as she always left theht sunshine, but she never dared, re how Philip used to sit outside her apartment and watch her

Hair dripping, she moved to the small desk in the corner of her room and pulled out a calendar The days had all been marked off except for today, so she took her red pen and put an X through it They signified all the days since Philip had died: 1,430 days

Leah dressed and carefully applied a silicone-based concealer that filled in the indented slash across her cheek It was a five-imen for almost four years Once the filler had set, she applied a base er along her cheek, wishing memories could be erased as easily

According to the eeon had operated and she was stabilized, a very talented plastic surgeon had been on-site, and he’d

carefully stitched up her face He’d

For a long time, she hated the scars Resented theift Deidre would never have to worry about scars, fillers or makeup These scars were now a reminder of how lucky she was to be alive

God, Deidre, ould do this to you?

If anyone could find the truth, it was Alex Morgan He had the eyes of a predator, a hunter The way he’d stared at her had re

Though Philip’s gaze had never been so steady There’d always been an edge, a fear he wasout, when he looked at the world They’d e He’d been with a group of friends and they’d been laughing Her father had just died and she’d been feeling lost She’d needed to feel connected to life and strength

The instant he’d seen her, he’d picked up his drink and moved toward her He’d told her she was beautiful, and if she wanted to dance, he’d be waiting for her at the bar

Her friends had called him cheesy, but she’d been charmed He appeared to be a athered the courage and asked hi: “Every Breath You Take” by The Police How many times had she looked back on thather a warning

Their courtship had been a ind, giving her no tins

Leah filled her cup with coffee Deidre would never have taken that kind of guff frouy like that in seconds Philip never would have gotten close enough to Deidre to undermine her as he had Leah

She sipped slowly She wanted to keep her past locked away No good cah she feared Alex sensed it Today, in the squad car, his gaze had been peeling back the layers of her defenses He knew there was more to her He sensed a probleet to the bottom of it

What happened to her four years ago had nothing to do with Deidre Nothing Philip was dead