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"No," said the old man, "that's just perfectly normal paranoia Everyone in the Universe has that"

"Everyone?" said Arthur "Well, if everyone has that perhaps it ! Perhaps somewhere outside the Universe we know"

"Maybe Who cares?" said Slartibartfast before Arthur got too excited "Perhaps I'm old and tired," he continued, "but I always think that the chances of finding out what really is going on are so absurdly re the sense of it and just keep yourself occupied Look at ot an award for Norway"

He rue perspex block with his name on it and a model of Norway moulded into it

"Where's the sense in that?" he said "None that I've been able tofjords in all et a major award"

He turned it over in his hands with a shrug and tossed it aside carelessly, but not so carelessly that it didn't land on so soft

"In this replaceiven ain because I happen to like theive a lovely baroque feel to a continent And they tell ave a hollow laugh "What does it s of course, but I'd far rather be happy than right any day"

"And are you?"

"No That's where it all falls down of course"

"Pity," said Arthur with syood lifestyle otherwise"

Soht flashed

"Come," said Slartibartfast, "you are to meet the mice Your arrival on the planet has caused considerable exciteather, as the third most improbable event in the history of the Universe"

"What were the first two?"

"Oh, probably just coincidences," said Slartibartfast carelessly He opened the door and stood waiting for Arthur to follow

Arthur glanced around him once more, and then down at hi in the

"I see tremendous difficulty with my lifestyle," he muttered to himself

"I beg your pardon?" said the old man mildly

"Oh nothing," said Arthur, "only joking"

Chapter 31

It is of course well known that careless talk costs lives, but the full scale of the problem is not always appreciated

For instance, at the verytremendous difficulty with my lifestyle," a freak wormhole opened up in the fabric of the space-time continuum and carried his words far far back in time across almost infinite reaches of space to a distant Galaxy where strange and warlike beings were poised on the brink of frightful interstellar battle

The two opposing leaders werefor the last time

A dreadful silence fell across the conference table as the cos, resplendent in his black jewelled battle shorts, gazed levelly at the G'Gugvuntt leader squatting opposite hi steam, and, with a million sleek and horribly beweaponed star cruisers poised to unleash electric death at his single word of coed the vile creature to take back what it had said about his mother

The creature stirred in his sickly broiling vapour, and at that verytremendous difficulty with my lifestyle drifted across the conference table

Unfortunately, in the Vl'hurg tongue this was thefor it but to wage terrible war for centuries

Eventually of course, after their Galaxy had been decimated over a few thousand years, it was realized that the whole thing had been a ghastlybattle fleets settled their few re differences in order to launch a joint attack on our own Galaxy--now positively identified as the source of the offending remark

For thousands hty ships tore across the e on to the first planet they came across--which happened to be the Earth--where due to a terrible miscalculation of scale the entire battle fleet was accidentally sed by a s

Those who study the complex interplay of cause and effect in the history of the Universe say that this sort of thing is going on all the time, but that we are powerless to prevent it

"It's just life," they say

A short aircar trip brought Arthur and the old Magrathean to a doorway They left the car and went through the door into a waiting roolass-topped tables and perspex awards Alht flashed above the door at the other side of the room and they entered

"Arthur! You're safe!" a voice cried

"Aood"

The lighting was rather subdued and it took hi round a large table beautifully decked out with exotic dishes, strange sweet their faces

"What happened to you?" demanded Arthur

"Well," said Zaphod, attacking a boneful of grilledour iven us a rather niceout a luan Rhino's cutlet It's delicious if you happen to like that sort of thing"

"Hosts?" said Arthur "What hosts? I don't see any"

A small voice said, "Welcome to lunch, Earth creature"

Arthur glanced around and suddenly yelped

"Ugh!" he said "There are mice on the table!"

There was an aard silence as everyone looked pointedly at Arthur

He was busy staring at thite lasses on the table He heard the silence and glanced around at everyone