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I co pressure of it all, and the words blurt from my lips before I can stop them “Two”

“Two?”

“Uh…yeah… I’ll be bringing my…boyfriend”

You’ll be…what? You don’t have a boyfriend, Looney Tunes!

“Your boyfriend? Oh, how exciting! Yoursomeone!”

“It’s…uh…fairly new”

Yeah, it sure is It hasn’t even fucking started yet…

Thinking better of my answer, I add to it quickly before Callie can undercut it “But serious Really serious, actually We’ve just been keeping it private so we can enjoy the perfectness by ourselves for a while”

Dear God, Ava

“That’s so awesome! What’s his name?”

Yeah, Ava! Tell your old archneinary boyfriend!

Panic sets in when I realize there is absolutely no way I can talk myself out of this conversation So, I do what anyone in my situation would do—avoid it

Three bangs ofdoor, I end the call in a rush, “Oh shoot, Callie! I have to go My boyfriend just got here, and we’re already late for a big, fancy Halloween party in SoHo Talk soon! Bye!” Click

It’s official I’m pathetic

IDate

Sure, my sister didn’t have an affair withhi nuptials will le Lucie sister And now, because I let Callie fucking Caet the best of me with her backhanded bullshit, I told the snooty biotch that I have a boyfriend and I’d help plan the reunion

Oy vey

Call hly doubt I can find a hot, Der escort in under sixty days

You know, you could just be an adult about this and tell Callie how you really feel—that you don’t have a boyfriend and you don’t want to help plan that stupid reunion with soh school…

That would certainly be the easy way out, wouldn’t it?