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CHAPTER ONE

WHAT AM I doing here? Phoebe Taylor asked herself for the hundredth tiet it to ust of Melbourne, Australia, wind, she walked on It would rain soon

She looked at the nan Morris Lane This was the correct place Phoebe didn’t even have to check the paper in her hand that was shoved into her pocket She had itthe past feeeks

When had she turned into such a pathetic and needy person?

It had happened slowly, over the last eight months as her ed you She’d had no idea how true those words were until it had happened to her She was even es she faced in the weeks ahead The fact she’d be handling thehtened her

She started down the cobblestone street lined with town houses Joshua had written that if she needed anything she could contact Ryan Matthews But as she to his all the time but few meant them But she had no one else to turn to There were teachers she worked with, but they all had their own lives, husbands and children They didn’t have time to hold her hand There were plenty of acquaintances but none that she would call on She’d take this chance because Joshua had said to And this was Joshua’s baby

But would this guy Ryan help her? Be there for her during the delivery afterwards? Take Joshua’s place at the birthing suite? Yeah, right She didn’t see anyto that job Who took on someone else’sand unborn child? She could never ask that of him Would she want to? She didn’t know thismate

When the walls of reality had started closing in on her and panic had arrived, she’d been unable to think of where to turn Joshua’s letter had called to her Seemed to offer her salvation Phoebe inhaled and released a breath She’d come this far She wouldn’t turn back now What was the worst Ryan Matthews could do? Send her away? Act like he’d never heard of her?

What she was sure of was she didn’t want to feel alone anymore She wanted someone to lean on Be near a person who had a connection to Joshua Hear a story or two that she could tell her son or daughter about their father Joshua and Ryan had been brothers in arms Been there for each other Joshua had assured her in his last letter seven , Ryan was the person to find Desperate, she was going to his house to see if that was true

Phoebe located the house nuainst the white fra down the street drew her attention for a second She pulled the paper out and looked at the address again, then at the entrance oncethe steps to the door, she hesitated Now she was stalling

What was she going to say to this guy?

She’d been rehearsing her speech for days and still didn’t know if she could get it out On the traain but couldn’t see she’d planned made her sound crazy Maybe she was But she had to say soive some explanation as to why she’d turned up on his doorstep

Hi, I’m Phoebe Taylor You were a friend ofto come see you So here I am

That should get his attention She placed a hand on her protruding ht will probably be I’ the father

The wind gusted again as shethe the handrail, she all but pulled her way up to the stoop Could she get any bigger? Her midwife Sophia had assured her she could, and would

After catching her breath, Phoebe knocked on the door She waited Thankfully, the small alcove afforded her some shelter from the wind

When there was no answer, she rapped again Seconds went by and still no one ca to Ryan It had taken her e to co late, surely he’d be home soon

To the right side of the door was a small wooden bench She’d just wait for a while to see if he showed up Bracing a hand against the wall, she eased herself down She chuckled humorously at the picture sheon top of a flowerpot

She needed to rest anyway Everything fatigued her these days Trying to keep up with twenty grade fivers wore her out but she loved her job At least her students kept hera baby soon Alone

Phoebe neversorry for herself, had prided herself on being strong, facing life head-on She’d alwaysand supportive when Joshua had prepared to leave on tour again and again When they’dinto So as the idea of having this baby aloneher come emotionally undone?

Pulling her coat tighter and leaning her head into the corner of the veranda, she closed her eyes She’d just rest a few minutes

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It was just after dark when Ryan Matthews pulled his sporty co the street It had been drizzling during his entire drive from the hospital Street la the sidewalk and even across the steps leading to homes

He’d had a long day that had involved h one Nothing had seeo as planned Not one but two of the babies had been breech Regardless, the babies had joined the world kicking and screarateful All the other difficulties seemed to disappear the second he heard a healthy cry He’d take welco with death any day

Stepping out of the car, he reached behind the driver’s seat and grabbed his duffel bag stuffed with his street clothes Too exhausted to change, he still wore his hospital uniforht was plenty He was looking forward to a hot shower, bed and the next day off It would be his first chance in over teeks to spend ti with a table he’d promised to repair for a friend, waited He wanted to think of nothing and just enjoy the process of creating so with his hands

Duffel in hand, a wad of dirty uniforht remained on over his door as he’d left it Halfway up the steps he halted There was an obviously pregnant woularly in his job as a midwife at Melbourne Victoria Hospital’s maternity unit Today more than he’d wanted to As if he didn’t have a full load at the hospital, they were noing up on his doorstep

By the blue tint of the woman’s lips and the way she was huddled into a ball, she’d been there for so better care of herself, especially at this stage in her pregnancy Her ar middle She wore a fashionable knit cap that covered the top of her head Strawberry-blond hair twisted around her face and across her shoulders With the rain and the te, she must be uncomfortable

Taking a resigned breath, Ryan moved farther up the steps As he reached the top the mysterious woe and a dark sable broith flecks of gold He’d never seenor sad ones in his life

His first instinct was to protect her He faltered That wasn’t a feeling he experienced often He made it his practice not to become involved with anyone Not to care too deeply He ta tired was all there was to it “Can I help you?”

The woh-for-the-weather coat closer as she stared at him

When she didn’t answer right away he asked in a weary voice, “Do you need help?”

“Are you Ryan Matthews?” Her soft Aussie accent carried in the evening air

His eyes widened and he stepped back half a pace, stopping before tu she couldn’t beabout her looked fa room sometime?

Ryan glanced at her ain He’d always made it a practice to use birth control Plus, this fe medical help

“Yes”

“I’m Phoebe Taylor”

Was that supposed toher face in the diht “Have we met before?”

“I should go” She reached out to touch the wall as if she planned to use it as support in order to stand When she did, a slip of paper fluttered to the stoop

Ryan picked it up In blue pen ritten his naiven it at the clinic?

He glared at her “Where did you get this?”