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I’ that I swore that I would never be But what I just did … how I sounded … it’s all too fa father

The trees are blurs in my vision as I walk away quickly, back to the house I barely stop to grab what I need, headphones, and my axe, before I find a fallen tree nearby the house, and start hacking it to pieces I will take every bit of er out on this tree, and drive every piece of that man out of me

None of him is welcoht, but I watch hih the s of the house, curious, and nervous and … so s at once

I don’t knohat happened at that picnic Or at least, I have no idea what happened to Caleb I knew that I was hitting below the belt with everything that I said to him Knew from the way that he talked about his family that there was some kind of wound there that was still raw And in that moment, I didn’t care if I hurt him Not after he hurt me

But the anger I saw co, and the devastation that clouded his face was equally shocking I brought out so in him that was unexpected, even to him

For the rest of the evening he works without stopping He chops an old dead tree into pieces and stacks the wood against the south wall of the house for firewood He gets a ladder and cleans out the gutters fro in the neooden planks to rebuild the front porch

All things that rich boys don’t often do And that’s reflected in the plans that he gaveThe docuined The plans he has for restoring the house are … perfect He wants to update things in a way that respects the integrity of the building without co its beauty

I checked every single thing on his list while he was outside with the sledgeha he’d overlooked

As I uest room bed, I think about what happened at the river er, I knew that Caleb would never hurt s that we are hiding, and I think heabout each other, and the fact that we have che sex doesn’t exactly ive hih and receptive, I’ll apologize

I have every right to be angry about the photos, but I do understand his reasoning, even if it was a dick h My grandfather wouldn’t be proud ofcruel to so, isn’t okay

And that’s what I did I knew that I was going to cause hiize

Before he couest bedroohly doubt that we’ll be sharing a bed for a while It’s probably for the best

But as I strip to nothing but a tank top and underwear, and go to bed alone, I miss his war alone for ht with Caleb, the bed feels empty

Geeze, Ally One night in a et an extra blanket towill be better—clearer—in the

I check ht Why am I wide awake?

Immediately I’m flooded with the memories of dreams Hands that skim my body, covered in callouses They someho exactly how to play my body like it’s an instrument for his pleasure But those aren’t a rich man’s hands How come I never noticed?

There’s a thump in the darkness, and my heart starts to pound Is that oke me? There’s another one, followed by a moan That’s Caleb I’ out of my room and into his

The barest hint of h to see that he’s having a night in on himself The desperation of the , pull at my heart He’s in pain—anyone could see that