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on, Anna Let's go find so to eat"

Jesse looks up "Excellent I'"

"Not you," I say "We're going to court"

On the day I graduated from Wheeler, the locusts ca in the branches of trees and thudding hard on the ground Theto explain the phenoues and El Nino and our prolonged drought They reco indoors

The graduation ceree white canvas tent As the salutatorian spoke, his s Locusts rolled off the sloped roof, falling into the laps of spectators

I hadn't wanted to coo Julia foundon my cap She wrapped her arms around my waist She tried to kiss me "Hey," she said "Which side of the earth did you drop off?"

I rehosts I pushed her away from me "Don't Okay? Just don't"

In every graduation photoas if this neorld were a place I actually wanted to live in, while all aroundas fists

What is ethical to a lawyer differs from what's ethical to the rest of the world In fact, we have a written code--the Rules of Professional Responsibility--which we have to read, be tested on, and follow in order to maintain a practice But these very standards require us to do things that most people consider immoral For example, if you walk into ht ask you where the body is "Under my bedroom floor," you tell me, "three feet down below the foundation of the house" If I am to do my job correctly, I can't tell a soul where that baby is I could be disbarred, in fact, if I do

All this means is that I'm actually educated to think that o hand in hand

"Bruce," I say to the prosecutor, "et rid of some of these traffic misdemeanors, I swear he'll never coain"

I wonder how al systeood hand of poker than it does with justice

Bruce is an all right guy Plus, I happen to know he's just been assigned to a double erald's conviction

"You knoe're talking about Judge Newbell's Humvee, Campbell," he says

"Yes I a is that anyone vain enough to drive a Hu to have it ripped off

"Let et eviscerated for suggesting it, but I'll tell hiive the kid a break"

Twenty ned all the forms, and Jesse stands beside me in the front of the court Twenty-five minutes later he is on probation, officially, and alk out onto the courthouse steps

It is one of those su up in your throat On days like this, I would have been sailing with my father

Jesse tips his head back "We used to fish for tadpoles," he says out of nowhere "Catch thes Not a single one, I swear it, ever arettes out of his shirt pocket "Want one?"

I haven't s a cigarette and lighting up Judge watches life happen, lolling his tongue Beside me, Jesse strikes afor Anna"

A car passes by, its radio playing one of those songs that stations never play in winter A blue stream of smoke flares out fro If there's aon the front lawn and feeling the grass cool down after sunset, holding a sparkler on the Fourth of July until it burned his fingers We all have so

She left the note underneath the windshield wiper of raduation Before I even opened it I wondered how she got to Newport, how she made her way back I carried it out to the Bay to read on the rocks; and after I was done I held it up and sniffed at it, in case it smelled like her

I was not technically allowed to drive, but that hardly mattered We met, as per that note, at the cemetery

Julia sat in front of the headstone, her arms clasped around her knees She looked up when she saw me "I wanted you to be different"

"Julia, it's not you"

"No?" She got to her feet "I don't have a trust fund, Ca your fingers, expecting ot it all wrong"

"I don't care about any of that"

"Bullshit you don't" Her eyes narrowed "What did you think, that it would be fun to go slu? Did you do it to piss off your parents? And now you can scrapeyou stepped in by accident?" She struck out atme across the chest "I don't need you I never needed you"

"Well, I fucking needed you!" I shouted back at her When she turned I grabbed her shoulders and I kissed her I took the things I couldn't bring myself to say, and poured them into her

There are sos we do because we convince ourselves it would be better for everyone involved We tell ourselves that it's the right thing to do, the altruistic thing to do It's far easier than telling ourselves the truth

I pushed Julia away from me Walked down that cemetery hill Didn't look back

Anna sits in the passenger seat, which doesn't go over ith Judge He hangs his sorry face into the front, right between us, panting up a storer of what's to come," I tell her

"What are you talking about?"

"If you want the right tothe on the rest of the world to clean up the messes"

She scowls at me "This is all because I called you to help ht you were my friend"

"I already told you once I'm not your friend; I'm your attorney There's a seminal difference"

"Fine" She fuo back to the police and tell the the passenger door open, although we are traveling on a highway

I grab the handle and slam it shut "Are you crazy?"

"I don't know," she answers "I'd ask you what you think, but it's probably not in the job description"

With a yank of the wheel, I pull the car to the shoulder of the road "You knohat I think? The reason no one ever asks you for your opinion about anything ie your mind so often they don't knohat to believe Takea judge for medical emancipation"

"Why wouldn't we be?"

"Ask your mother Ask Julia Every tio through with this" I look down at the armrest, where her hand sits--purple sparkle polish, nails bitten to the quick "If you want to be treated like an adult by the court, you need to start acting like one The only way I can fight for you, Anna, is if you can prove to everyone that you can fight for yourself when I walk away"

I pull the car back onto the road, and glance at her sidelong, but Anna sits with her hands wedged between her thighs, her face set mutinously ahead "We're alive the door a good slam in my face"

"We're not going to o to the fire station My dad and I are staying there for a while"

"Is it ination, or did I not spend a couple of hours at the faht you told Julia that you didn't want to be separated fro about, Anna," I say, bangingwheel "What the hell do you really want?"

When she blows, it is reuinea pig I'sick enough for this fa, and takes off at a dead run to the firehouse, a few hundred feet in the distance

Well Deep in the recesses of my little client is the potential to make other people listen It ined

And on the heels of that thought: Anna ht be able to testify, but what she's said makes her seehly unlikely to convince the judge to rule in her favor

BRIAN

FIRE AND HOPE ARE CONNECTED, just so you know The way the Greeks told it, Zeus put Pro life on earth Epi out bonuses like swiftness and strength and fur and wings By the tiiven out He settled for ave them fire

Zeus, pissed off, took it away But Pro and unable to cook He lit a torch froain To punish Prole fed on his liver To punish ift, a box she was forbidden to open

Pandora's curiosity got the best of her, and one day she opened that box Out caed to shut the lid tight before hope escaped It's the only weapon we have left to fight the others

Ask any fireman; he'll tell you it's true Hell Ask any father

"Come on up," I say to Campbell Alexander, when he arrives with Anna "There's fresh coffee" He followsI pour two cups "What's the dog for?"

"He's a chick net," the lawyer says "Got any milk?"

I pass hi It's quiet up here; the boys are downstairs washing the engines and doing their daily maintenance

"So" Alexander takes a sip of his coffee "Anna tells me that you've both moved out"