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But the book Cate was reading wasn’t conducive toher sleepy, and eventually she turned off the la to Lia

“The past is the past, Cate,” he’d told her “You haven’t been trying to relinquish the past You’ve been trying to outrun it, and that won’t work The past will always catch up with you if you try to outrun it You’ve got to just let it go”

She wanted to She did She really did Last night Liaht he’d proved her wrong, too He’d proved Vishenko hadn’t killed that part of her as she’d thought, the part that could respond to aabout that, what else was she wrong about? Was Liaht when he said she wasn’t a coward because she’d run instead of killing Vishenko all those years ago?

She wanted to believe it Just as she wanted to believe in Lias were trueif she could believe the day-to-day Maybe she could have a futurewith Liam

Then she reether, digging the nails of one hand into the pal She hadn’t told him because she didn’t want him to know But when she testified, the whole world would know she hadn’t fought Vishenko to the bitter end The whole world would know she’d surrenderedand so would Liam

Coward, coward, coward, sheshe should have told hi that secret froht years ago

So s she should have done, but hadn’t Not the least of which hy hadn’t she fought longer? Why had she surrendered? Easy now to say she would never have escaped if Vishenko hadn’t believed he’d conquered her Easy now to say he would never have relaxed his guard around her so she could testify against him if he hadn’t believed she was vanquished Easy now to say she would never have had access to the documents that were so vital to the conspiracy trial if he hadn’t believed he’d broken her spirit

Liaht that she didn’t have it in her to kill Vishenko as he lay sleeping the night she escaped She’d hated hieance—and she still did But she hadn’t been able to kill him Even if she’d knohat he would do in the future, ould die, could she have killed hily?

No And not because she was a coward Liaht about everything?

Suddenly she wanted to see Lia her realize the truth about herself—that she wasn’t a coward just because she couldn’t kill And ht She wanted to lie in his arms and believe herself loved Cherished She wanted to let the past go and just beCate Cate and Lia he had to offer

She slipped froht through the frontgave her enough light to see by, and she knelt beside the cot, then hesitated His face in sleep was just different enough fro self so she kneas asleep, and he see there she didn’t have the heart to waken him

She couldn’t help cataloging his face though, as she watched hi distinctive, except perhaps his eyelashes Absurdly long for a man, which was even more obvious when seen with his eyes closed But she was intensely attracted to him Why? He wasn’t traditionally handsome—his features were too stark for that So as it about Liam that set him apart from everyone else, even Alec, whom Liam resembled so closely?

It’s not his face, she realized eventually It’s his character His character is reflected in his face, in his eyes Morally strong, with a tender heart So generous, too—a born giver And kind A good man, like his brother Yes, like Alec, but somehow more More concerned More protective More emotionally involved All the virtues, in fact, of the best heroes in the ro armor

Suddenly she realized he ake and watching her with those beautiful brown eyes As if he’d sensed her presence beside his cot “What’s wrong, Cate?” he whispered, reaching ie of the cot

She put out a hand to stop hi,” she said softly “I just” She couldn’t bring herself to put what she wanted into words