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Back at the Brotherhood's mansion, Z stood at one of the s in his and Bella's bedrooardens His wrist burned from where the laser had been applied, but the pain wasn't bad

"I'," he said "Well, other than the fact that I liked the doc"

Bella came up behind hiuy, wasn't he"

As they stood together, there was a whole lot of what-now floating around the room Unfortunately he didn't have any answers He'd kind of banked on the bands being re better

Although it wasn't as if there weren't still scars on his face

From the nursery Nalla let out a burble and then a hiccup A cry was next

"I just fed her and changed her," Bella said, pulling away "I'm not sure what this is about--"

"Let ht voice "Let me see if I can"

Bella's eyebrows lifted, but then she nodded "Okay I'll stay here"

"I won't drop her I promise" "I know you won't Just make sure you support her head"

"Right Got it"

Z felt like he was going unarmed into a field of lessers when he walked into the nursery

As if sensing him, Nalla let out a whiffle

"It's your father Dad Papa" What would she call him?

He went over and peered down at his daughter She was dressed in a Red Sox onesie, no doubt a gift fro like it wanted to leap off the tip of her chin but was afraid of the drop

"Why are you crying, little one?" he said softly

When she lifted her arms up to hilad He didn't want anyone seeing hoard he was as he reached into the crib and

Nalla fit between his hands perfectly, her butt in one of his palhtened and brought her up, she was surprisingly sturdy and warm and--

She grabbed onto his turtleneck and pulled into hily easy As he held her against his chest, she settled i herself flush into his body

Having her in his ar for the rocker and sitting down and using one of his feet to o back and forth

Staring at her lashes and her plurip on his turtleneck, he realized just how much she needed him--and not just to protect her She needed him to love her, too

"Looks like you are getting along," Bella said quietly from the doorway

He glanced up "She seems to like me"

"How could she not?"

Looking back down at his daughter, he said after a while, "It would have been great to get them removed The tats But she'd still ask about my face"

"She's going to love you anyway She already does"

He ran his forefinger over Nalla's arainst his heart and played patty-cake on the back of his free hand

From out of nowhere, he said, "You didn't talk to me much about your abduction"

"Iah, I didn't want to upset you"

"Do you find yourself protecting ht upset me a lot?"

"No"

"You sure about that?"

"Zsadist, if I do, it's because--"

"I'm not much of a male if I can't be there when you need me"

"You are always there for me And we did talk about it some"

"Some"

God, he felt like shit for all she had had to do alone, just because of his head fuck

And yet her voice was strong and sure as she said, "When it comes to the abduction, I don't want you to know every little thing that happened Not because you can't handle it, but because I don't want to give that bastard any more influence over oing to give hi to happen-- and that would be true whether or not you had been through anything traumatic"

Z e that she'd spoken, but he didn't agree with her He wanted to give her everything she needed She deserved nothing less And his past had impacted them Still did Christ, the way he'd been about Nalla had been--

"May I tell you so in confidence?" she said

"Of course"

"Mary wants a baby" Z's eyes shot up "She does? That's great--"

"A biological one"

"Oh"

"Yeah She can't have one of her own, so Rhage would have to lay with a Chosen"

Z shook his head "He would never do that He won't be with anyone but Mary"

"That's what she says But if he doesn't, she can't hold a piece of him in her arms"

Yeah, because IVF didn't work on vampires "Shit"

"She hasn't talked to Rhage about it yet because she's sorting her own feelings out first She talks to me so she can ride the peaks and valleys of her eer So so badly, she thinks she can handle it Other days she simply can't bear the idea on any level and considers adoption My point is, you can't work out all your stuff with your partner And you shouldn't You were there for me afterward You're there for me now I never question that But that doesn'tis a "

He tried to picture hi Bella all the ins and outs of the abuse he'd been subjected toNono ould he want her to break her heart over the fucked up nighth

"Did you talk to someone?" he asked

"Yes, at Havers's And I talked to Mary" There was a pause "And I went backto where I'd been held"

His eyes flipped up and bored into hers "You did?"

She nodded "I had to"

"You never told me" Fuck, she'd been back there? Without him?