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She looked up at the fat clouds and gave a shake of her head “Let me ask you a question”

“Okay”

“What’s going on with you and him?” She jerked her chin in Sebastian’s direction

“Nothing,” I answered quickly “He’s just helping me out”

“Really? That’s what you’re going to say?” Her hand tightened on the strap of her bag “Because I know he’s not just helping you out”

“He’s—”

“He told Skylar that he was into you,” she interrupted, dark eyes hard

I blinked “He said what?”

“Skylar told Daniela that he ad,” she explained, shifting her weight fro back with her, because he couldn’t do that when he had feelings for you So are you telling me that you have no idea? After all this time you’ve been obsessed with him on the do, you don’t know he feels this way about you? That he hasn’t been up front with you?”

“I” I stepped back,in the back seat

“I cannot believe you wouldn’t tell me about that, especially since I kno you’ve felt about him How upset you hen you kissed him and he seemed like he wasn’t interested in that,” she said, her voice cracking slightly “I’m one of your closest friends and I’m still here I’m still alive and you haven’t toldthat I know is important”

Oh my God My entire body jerked I had not expected the conversation to be about this “I just didn’t want to talk about it I mean, I did I wanted to call you and Dary the moment Sebastian told me how he felt, but I haven’t really been able to process it What he said came out of nowhere and I don’t even know if he really feels that way or if it’s because ofbecause of everything that happened,” I admitted in a rush “And after what happened, it doesn’t feel right talking about Sebastian like nothing happened”

“That’s the thing, Lena What happened didn’t just happen to you Yeah, you were in that car, and God only knohat you saw and went through I have no idea You knohy? Because you won’t talk to me about it You won’t talk to Dary—”

“I just ca of razors in my throat “It’s only been—”

“It’s been teeks and three days since the accident I know,” Abbi shot back, her chest rising and falling heavily “I know exactly how an, Cody, Phillip and Chris have died I know exactly howto die, too”

I sucked in a sharp breath “Abbi—”

Her voice wavered as she said, “Do you realize that? That all of us thought you were also dead in that car? Or that you were going to die like Cody had in the hospital? Thather arm out in his direction “—believed that? And then, e find out you’re alive, we hear you don’t even want to see us?”

Tears blurredno idea what else to say “I’m sorry My head It’s just—”

Abbi held up her hand “A part ofto talk Can even understand your reluctance to talk about noret that you’ve been through a lot So have I So have Dary and Sebastian and Keith and everyone at this damn school, but what I don’t—” She closed her hand into a fist and looked skyward, counting to five under her breath “What I don’t understand is how you got in that car, Lena How Cody could be that drunk and you still got into that car You weren’t drunk I ith you right before you left and you weren’t drunk, but you still got into that car and you let Cody drive”

I drew back as if I’d been smacked I didn’t knohat to say at first and then the shock gave way to anger—red, burning-hot anger that erupted inside ot in the car with Chris and caht he was messed up You—”

“We thought he was on so We didn’t know definitely,” she said, nostrils flaring “And he didn’t drive off the road and kill four people, did he? No”

My ht, but it was also so da where she was and I was existing where I was

“Hey, is everything okay here?” Sebastian appeared at our sides His hand landed on the saze focused on Abbi His jaas hard, stare unflinching

“Yeah” Abbi breathed in deeply “Everything is fine I’ll see you guys later”

Shoulders tensed, I watched her wheel around and stalk off tohere she was parked Abbi had lied