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Khaled loved her, she knew he did, yet he illing to give her up because he thought that wouldrun That hat she’d sat with after he’d gone, shaking there in that fussy house all by herself He’dto protect her in his own terrible way And what had she done in return?

He’d laid it all out before her on Saint Ann Street and she knew he’d been right, as unpleasant as all those truths were for her to s She’d left him without a word And then she’d thrown her birth control pills in his face—because on some level, she’d known exactly what that would inspire hiive ive because it hat she had wanted Then, at the end, she’d delivered an ultimatum to cap it all off

Cleo had co conclusion that she was a spoiled brat

“You know I’ll support you no matter what,” Jessie had said carefully “But I feel I wouldn’t be any kind of friend to you if I didn’t remind you that you were in a panic when you left him You were convinced that if you stayed with him, you would disappear completely into his life”

“I’m not an innocent in this,” Cleo had told her, and there was so h her hair and held it there at the crown of her head “I think the feeling of disappearing has to do with real compromise, and I’m as bad at is as he is No wonder I panicked”

Jessie hadn’t looked convinced, but she’d nodded “But do you think that if you go back he’ll see that as capitulation?”

“I don’t know,” Cleo had whispered “But I love him”

And for the first time, she understood how deep that ran, how true it was, how it had sneaked inside and taken root without her being entirely aware of it How it filled her from the inside out, and of course that felt like too much Of course she’d run from it It felt like his desert sky, enorht

She’d looked at Jessie helplessly “I have to go and find out I have to try”

And it wasn’t until Cleo was hours into the long flight back to Jhurat that she’d realized that she’d never tried particularly hard with Brian She’d certainly never considered trying after she’d found hi Maybe that hy she wasn’t worried about capitulating now Because as Khaled had shown her that night he’d let her tie hi if it represented a loss Otherwise, as it but a little bit of bending?

And love wasn’t worth much if it couldn’t stand to bend