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“He smiles real peaceful-like, totally laid back, and sticks out his hand ‘Nice to meetcha, mate’”

I cannot stress how adorable Derek’s bad English accent was

“So Ryan gushes all over him – ”

“I was not gushing,” Ryan said crossly

“ – and Killian just suitar – just little whispers of his fingers over the strings It’s not plugged in, so you can barely hear hi to us, like his brain and his hands are disconnected

“So I say, ‘We’re in a band And one day we’re going to get you to be our guitarist’”

I frowned in disbelief That was a pretty ballsy thing to say

“Ryan looks at hed, took a hit on his joint, and nodded his head ‘Well… let me hear you first,’ he says

“Ryan doesn’t have an instru the bass guitar stuff over The bassist is pissed, but Killian tells hi to quit Gobsmacked and join our band if he doesn’t let Ryan borrow the bass So the bassist threatens to cut Ryan’s balls off if he fucks up his bass, and then he goes off to get drunk Ryan’s freaking out at this point, but I couldn’t be happier

“Killian asks ant to play, and I say, ‘Whole Lotta Love,’ which is a Zeppelin tune Killian nods like he’s happy to hear it Ryan’s killer at this – we’ve practiced it, like, fifty times here in the baseood, Ryan’s losing his nervousness, and Killian just owns the song It was like we’re playing with fuckin’ Ji a little crowd

“Then Killian is like, ‘What’s next?’ and I say ‘Higher Ground,’ and he says, ‘Stevie or Peppers?’ because the Chili Peppers covered the original Stevie Wonder song, and I say, ‘Chili Peppers’ Killian tells soet the drummer from Gobsmacked, and he comes back and he’s pissed, but Killian tells hiher Ground’ So the guy does, and it ROCKS We’re getting a bigger crowd We play a couple er comes back in and he is PISSED that he’s not the center of attention, and he and the bassist basically get the roadies to load all the equipment up and tell us to fuck off