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“Oh ratulations!”

“Thank you” Mysun

“I feel like the luckiestmy mother’s face with kisses

“Oh, stop it, Sally!” She giggles and slaps hirins down at her

“Darlin’, I’er”

“You’ve already set the date?” the receptionist asks, and my mother’s next words make me feel like I’m about to pass out

“Noveether “I have soto do, but I’m so excited!”

Oh, holy fuck Why does it feel like I’et off?

Not to mention, I’ve yet to break the news to Willow that mom’s new “casual” relationship is headed down the aisle—and, according to my mother, in a month, no less I told Willow I’d call her after this appointe the news that Moed, and, oh by the way, I’ve slept with our future brother

“I guess we should have told the kids, huh, Stell?” Sal states with an amused smile and a soft chuckle “By the looks on their faces, I’d say they’re a bit surprised”

I glance over my shoulder, and Ryan looks like he just drank curdled milk

Which I definitely understand Since I feel like he threw up the contents of his foul drink right in my own mouth

“What do you think, Car?” et words out of my mouth, but I do

“Nove news”

Although, the enthusias The tone of my voice would match perfectly with the environment of a funeral, but my mom doesn’t appear to notice because she’s too blissed out and amped up on happiness

“You and Willow better be here for our big day!” My ht and squealing into my ear “And Ryan, too! I want all my kids there, okay?”

All her kids Good God Why is this happening?

I do e is a halfhearted pat to her back with one hand and a pathetic “Okay”

“Congrats, Dad,” I hear Ryan say behind me, but I don’tto be happy for his father, but also, his e train is rolling Like, a bullet train is really freaking cool as long as you’re not strapped to the tracks while it runs you over

One month And we’ll officially be stepbrother and stepsister