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“I’ht, Sal? We’re taking the class!”

Sal doesn’t say anything, though Probably because he’s too busy staring—and drooling—at -ass

“Ladies, now you knoe can’t have our class if you’re going to be arguing the whole time” Carrie tries to placate the two crazies, but it’s no use Mynonsense toward each other, with Nan occasionally joining in on the insanity

“Get a room!”

“Get a new scooter!”

“Get a life!”

“You’re an old hag!”

The jabs are flying left and right at such a rapid pace, it’s hard to knoho is saying what

“Your !”

“Don’t you talk about my momma like that! She was a wonderful woman!”

“Yeah, well, my mom was a nurse in the war!”

By this point, the instructor, bless her heart, has lost all control, and other people in the pool start shouting their frustration

“The clubhouse needs to get some better chefs!”

“Yeah! The chicken is crap!”

“I hate this class!”

“Me too! I hate aerobics!”

“And I hate the music you play in this class!”

When I realize soet this shit under control, I hop up froers to my lips, I whistle so loud it makes Nan cover her ears

“That’s enough!” I exclaim “Everyone just calm down!”

The group goes silent, and I try to ignore the way soly eyes and keep going “Betty and Nan, you till stay in the class at that end of the pool, and we’ll do our own class at the other end! And whoever is supposed to be in this nice lady’s water aerobics class needs to stay in this class, even if you don’t want to be there or don’t like the ood for your health!”

“Goddammit! This place is like a prison” One little old man splashes a frustrated hand in the water, but for the most part, it appears I’ve settled down the out-of-control crowd enough to put their verbal pitchforks away

Carrie looks at me ide, thankful eyes, and I just offer her a small smile and nod of my head

Goodness, I feel for that wohtwater aerobics to this lot of judgy old people

But a few ins instructing her class in warmup stretches, my mother breaks my bliss bubble