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Everyone knows that the best tiets up first thing in theto catch up on, and with, the Internet after a weekend of doing whatever But bloggers do a lot of whatever on the weekends, including prep work for the Monday blogs Saturday night was a wash, because Olivia went to theabout the year in the life of a fairl character wore Olivia preferred the winter outfit with the long sleeves and white scarf to the sue thanks to dirty old men and anime boys

That was a problem, even in Austin, Texas, which was totally liberal and friendly, with decent weather most of the tiaze The blonde cheerleader look was still the default, and ly boys as a forirls, with cleavage! and hats! So for Monday, Olivia picked out a ridiculously oversized sweatshirt she had thrifted a while ago, and tiny shorts nobody would see because the shirt cas, and what she called her My So-Called Life boots She i herself out theof fifth period Social Studies and flinging her ar squirrel, and gliding safely to the endzone of the school’s football field And the shirt even read DRAKE UNIVERSITY--put a bird on it! was always good advice Look assembled, photos taken and properly cropped Then the witchy-sar a goofy hick accent for her own amusement, five minutes later Unfolded and unfurled, the piece was over twenty feet long It zig-zagged across the floor of Olivia’s already cluttered room The center of it was insanely narrow, but the fabric was stretchy, like nylon Soe poofy bottom and a top that was a petaled flower of shoulder pads and sees-slash-huh, what?? She snatched up her phone to take so to fashionn00bnet The hardcore Olivia thought of as the ladysphere was always online

The comments flooded in, but nobody knehat the hell it was

Bibian Bestwould guessed: Like a bicycle-built-for-two, but a garment

Joan of Park(Place) wondered: Soet some stilts and see if it fits then! But which holes are for which appendages, eh?

MsCantBeWrong tried: Snuggie Couture

Three other bloggers announced that they were totally going to change their screen nah It was nice to have friends in every tiirl, even if nobody understood as on the floor at Olivia’s feet The pictures were tu so other than a horrific factory error or a prank on Olivia’s part Then, at the stroke of ht, when Sunday turned to Monday, there was a new comment Olivia always slept with her phone It blazed to life, and she read:

YOUIDIOTDOTCOM: INSIDEOUT!!! On t’a bercé trop près du riefers and trolls, but she knew not a word of French and hoped that it would be some sort of clue, so she decided to let the co Olivia took Spanish, because it was easy and the maid could help when it wasn’t, but she could ask a French teacher, ornasty, or dirty?

"Nice shirt!" a pimply fifth-year senior shouted as Olivia walked down the hall to ho three hundred pounds?" It was the greasy kid from the other day, Olivia realized

She turned to hiive you one ht?" She had a Swatch--1990 Robin Gj103, day-glo green and pink with little Kirbyesque superheroes decorating the band--on her left wrist andup the sleeve of her sweatshirt to count down the seconds

"Uhmet it?" He looked around for support, but only got a sneer froirl on her way to the honors ho from her obedient boyfriend The senior ss froht I’m sorry"

"Okay, thank you," Olivia said She would have left it at that, but so witchy his way stunk, and it wasn’t just his Hatebreed T-shirt So Olivia found herself asking hi?"

"Why?"

"Is it French?"

"Yeah My mother’s French, so I took it all four years Why?"