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I’ I meet his eyes Hope swells in my chest “She’s not dead? She’ll be okay?”

“She’s alive, yes Unconscious, but alive”

“So much blood…” I stue and tu pretty bad, but the doctors will be able to stop it, I’ else I’m back in ti so to me, but I don’t hear him either, since I tuned out after the words lost the baby I’ India…dead She never told one, and so is the baby I never even knew about

Handsshirt off, wipe my torso with a hot, damp towel I let them I’m in so many places Torn, ot to know or hold, gone I would have been there But I never go the chance No one askswho can’t read that I wouldn’t want a baby

Not fair, though India didn’t get a chance either Maybe she would have told me Let me be a father We talked about kids, India and I She wanted theht Didn’t tell her I would have loved the child and let him be whoever he wanted to be, even if he couldn’t read It’s all I wanted, all ain

Sudden rage burns throughand beyond powerful

It’s not fking fair

I’ as someone who looks like me heaves to his feet, picks up the nearest object—a heavy, thickly-padded leather ar door Glass shatters, scatters, the fran hands touchto be okay, Colton” My father’s voice,low in my ear “Just calm down”

But he doesn’t know He doesn’t knowI went through I shove him away and stalk out the front door My rental has been moved, and I climb behind the wheel Jim Hawthorne slides in next to , son?” His voice is carefully neutral

“I’ son” I’m not fine, but it doesn’t matter

I force myself to drive halfway norh, Jim puts his hand on my forearm

“Wait a sec, Colt”

I knohat this is about “Not the time, Jim”