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I have to ado stargazing, like right now

"I don’t know" I roll over in the bed of his truck and look over at hi at the starry night sky above us, with his arm draped across his forehead "Maybe But ould our future say?"

He glances at me from the corner of his eye "How about you telljust this until toertip

"And then what?"

"And then we’ll go to school and keep going to school until we graduate college"

He cocks a brow at ht away?"

"You do I know you well enough to know you want a good life, just like ently kiss his cheek "You want to knohat I want to do in the next thirty seconds, though"

His sht "I have a couple of ideas"

"Oh yeah? You think you know me that well?"

He lifts his head up but doesn’t kissan inch short "I think I do"

"Then what aaze fixed on his eyes no matter how much it wants to drift to his lips

"That I’ person ever," he teases then seals hismy mind perfectly And that’s hoe stay for what feels like hours, searching each other’s ht for a couple of months now

When he finally does coo further, but to tell ling through my hair as he peers up at me

My heart ceases in my chest

He loves ht? Conner is perfect, heading so me with him He makes me smile when I’m sad Takes me places I’ve never been before Makesfeel like a dream instead of… life

"I love you too," I whisper back

We start kissing again, only this tireeing to go further Clothes just co feels perfect, even when a stor love through the rainstor, life--the world--feels…

Surreal

Like a dream

If it is, then never let hth, when I hear the news At first I wonder if I’ve lost myright at me, like she all of a sudden sees me, and there’s no hate in her eyes, only sorrow Then she opens herAt first I think I’ve heard her wrong That soenic and what I’ht herself until I eventually coh and I’ her correctly

"Ryder’s dead," she says as she sobs, grasping onto the doorfra her up

Ryder’s dead?

Ryder’s dead?

Ryder’s dead?

Suddenly,seems misplaced All this tioddaet tords out as I sit up and stagger to my feet

"Ryder’s dead!" This ti out of her eyes as she collapses to the floor on her knees

I’ed since I elve years old, and she’s always seemed pretty content about it But now she’s not content She’s breaking on my bedroom floor because Ryder is dead

My older sister is dead

Gone

And I never got to know her

Not really

Never got to tell her that I loved her

Never told her I’ the dark cloud in the fahts as I make my way over to my mother Then I drop down on , I wrapatthat I a?

How can Ryder be dead when I just saw her a feeeks ago?

How? Why? How?

"I don’t want you to be sorry," she sobs hysterically, trying to push away from me but I pull her closer, not sure what else to do "I want it to be you!"

It feels like a slap across the face

A fking knife inout

No, I’ That I was really hallucinating the entire ti in htmare

But it’s not

I know it’s not