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"Once upon a tis on a positive side a lot," I say as I stare at a picture of er ended up covering part of the lens "She had such hope inside her that everything was going to turn out okay That despite the tragedy with her dad, she would grow up and be happy" I turn the page and then run ers across a picture of Landon with his head tipped down as he stares at soround "What she didn’t realize is that tragedy was going to hit her again and her happily-ever-after wouldn’t exist anyest tiether, one where he’s kissingbecause his hair tickles ht be one of ood life again, for the most part, anyway But when it came to relationships, she’d be confused and she’d analyze it all the time, who she was supposed to end up with in life But an ansould never co if maybe she was just supposed to be alone in the world" I sit up and pullmy chin on top of them, and stare down at a picture that captured a one as soon as the flash died "That host" As soon as I say it, though, I know it’s not true Yes, Landon did take a piece ofI know because I can feel a pull to sohtstand, open the drawer, and take out Quinton’s sketches, which I picked up froas when he disappeared froers across the lines and shadings One of theirlfriend who died in the car accident The way he captures her, the dark lines draith such passion, lets me kno much he cared about her The second is a picture of himself, only half of his face is skeletal, and then the final one is of me The lines aren’t dark and full of passion like Lexi’s They’re actually really light, like he was afraid to drawI wonder if he was--if he still is afraid of etto et situated on the bed, I take a deep breath and dial Quinton’s nus, because I’m not sure how he’ll react

But he doesn’t answer and I end up lying indecent today after I get back fro It helps me block out all the boxes in the house when I walk inside, and the fact that in about ten ht back out the door isn’t too bad either

"Hey, you’re ho me off in the foyer He’s dressed in old jeans and a faded shirt and he’s wiping his hands on a towel

"I could say the sa for the phone in"Why are you home?"

He tosses the towel down on the back of the chair in the living room "I actually have soinia a little bit early Next week, actually"

"Are you kiddingetic expression "But don’t worry It’s going to take ure you can stay here while I do"

"Stay here for a feeeks and then what? Ifor the stairs "I already told you I don’t want to do that"

"I knohat you said, but that’s just how things are," he says, catching hold ofme because he never does In fact, when I really think about it he never has I can even reave raduation

"Well, I’o of ives me a look of pity as he rolls up his sleeves "But sos we don’t want to do"

"I know that, but I just can’tto find soh money saved up for that?" he wonders as he reaches for a folded-up box on the floor near the front door

I unzipout" I think about what Nova said about getting a roo"

"Are you sure that’s what you want to do?" He places the box on the floor beside his feet "Because…" He es the back of his neck tensely "Because I was really looking forward to you co if he really means it or not It’s hard to tell with him, but I want to believe that he does, so that’s how I’s "I want--need to stay here"

"But I worry about you living alone and what ht relapse"

"If it’s going to happen, then it’s going to happen," I say, rubbing some paint off the back ofhere and doing what I’ to make it more possible for ood Haven’t wandered in places I don’t belong Haven’t lost control I just hope nothing triggers me to do otherwise

He unfolds the box "Well, if you absolutely need to stay at the house, then you can until the new buyers move in, which I think is nexttape up off of the sofa "But Quinton, I just want to make sure that you stay in touch with e out of et my work clothes on I put on holey jeans, an insulated coat, then solad , but I still have the huge probleood-bye to this ho ready to head down the stairs, I glance around at the sketches and photos on the wall I still haven’t taken the on I stare at a picture of Lexi on the wall, the one where she’s shtly it makes er to the photo, noting how badly iveas I pull the photo off the wall, feeling so forward this way… keep healing instead of dying?" I wish I could hear her say yes I wish that for just one o