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"You knohat Madison let ; I can tell by the way she’s standing on her tippy toes, like she wants to get the words toLeah up onher up the stairs Maybe she’ll be so distracted by this story to feel sad about the news I’ive her at the top

"She let me ride her pony," Leah bea to want a real pony

"Uh huh! And I fed it a carrot And then atched it poop," she giggles I laugh with her, not letting myself look at the closed door across the hall froood day," I say

Leah nods

"I have to tell you soood day And…when I’m done, I want you to know that there’s a present for you, okay?" Thank god Paige left a present

"Present?" Leah says Her front teeth are larger than the rest, and it makes her lisp her S’s It’sthe seashell thing a dozen times

"Yep," I s her Paige is gone is like going through it all over again--and it e cao?" I start She’s s "Well, her sister needed her to coain And she needed her just as e needed us for a while"

She did need me For a while And I know she loved me somewhere in there

"She’s not here any at the closed door, her hand picking at the bottom of her dress

"No, sweetie But…" I walk her to her rooift on her bed "She left soo to her gift I tilther on She walks toward it tentatively, pulling the letter out fro it earlier today She holds it up for e calls her a princess I like it too It was a nice touch

When I’, she has a faint smile on her face, and she pulls carefully at the lid on the perfectly-square pink box, al inside, afraid to see it all too quickly She catches a glinizes, then pulls the lid away, tossing the few sheets of tissue paper out of her way too What she holds up is a very tall, very pink, very expensive-looking high heel They’re the exact shoes Paige earing the first tihter loved her then

I think maybe I did too

She reaches into the box for the other one, next working her fingers on her sandals, kicking thee’s shoes Her feet swi the carpet, scooting in a circle so she can face hts up the ee to thank for that

Chapter 17

Paige

Thank god they switched rooms This is the room I started in, and I didn’t want to be soer roo back They’ve repainted everything white, too Cass said the floor’s resident assistant got in trouble for letting them paint in the first place

I like the white It’s clean--like a fresh start

It’s been a week I don’t think ti, my routine is the same I wake up before Cass and Rowe I shower I dress And then I spend an hour hiding out in the hallway surfing the Internet, obsessing over Twitter, looking for a sign of anything more than what’s come out

That one story is still the only one that comes up I know Chandra left campus Cass said she thinks she took a e transcript than a forced trip to rehab I hate that she was allowed to take a medical withdrawal I’d rather see FAILURE stamped on her files I’m spiteful when it comes to her--and I’m okay with that

My video hasn’t seemed to spread any farther either Most days, I look for that first I care about me more than her I’row less worried over beco a viral hit the more time that passes, but I don’t--I worry er it takes to leak to the world, theit will have when it does But it see viral I wish I could have predicted this would happen before I had a very honest and frank discussion with my father on Monday Houston never cashed my check for the first month’s rent, whichaccount never disappeared My mom freaked out, so I lied