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Tanner

My shoulders rose with a deep sigh Last night had been such a disaster I hadn’t planned on drinking asif I said I didn’t knohy I’d done it After what happened between Tanner and me, I’d been a nervous wreck, especially after Kyler and Syd had returned Besides being thoroughly confused, everything had changed between us I could no longer be around him and see hi I did or said in front of hi back, I knew I had let ht than it should have and I had started drinking yesterday so I could relax That had been the plan, but like Tanner had said, I hadn’t stopped

I never stopped at one or two drinks, because I didn’t kno

Closing my eyes, I let e part of s that I didn’t have a problem I wasn’t the dreaded A-word I knehat an alcoholic looked like

An ihts

For ues, but not from us Every moment he was home, he drank Didn’tor Christmas So many special moments he’d o, when Mo to AA h start and he’d had to take a sabbatical froh

I wasn’t like my dad

I didn’t drink every day, but…as I drew in another shaky breath, I opened my eyes I wasn’t stupid Alcoholism didn’t mean someone drank all the time, but I didn’t have that problem No way I would not slip down that rabbit hole, especially after seeing what it had done to my family I wasn’t that weak

Maybe I did drink too much on occasion Okay I totally did that And maybe very few people who knew me in real life actually took me seriously because of it And maybe… God, I was a mess with or without a drink sometimes

A lot of tiaze wander over the tall pines surrounding the backyard What in the world was I going to do about Tanner? Just the thought of hiht I was a h ht, hadn’t I?

Blinking back the sudden rush of tears, I gave a little shake of my head I felt like I’d disappointed him somehow Like I had let down o to med school Like I’d disappointed Sydney when she had kindly suggested that I talk to someone when she discovered I had anxiety attacks and I’d told her that I didn’t need to talk to anyone

But worse yet, I was disappointed in