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Heather’s eyes got big, but they quickly went back to nor strangled, "Huh"

That was it? "You’re not surprised?"

"Girl," she started, her voice hoarse She blinked, cleared her throat, and said in a clearer tone, "I don’t think that will shock anyone"

I closed ht If this was her reaction--dear god--that ht andheavy I was having a panic attack, right here at this party

Heather had been watchingto catch some air, she shot up from her chair "Christ" She went into the bathroo a second later She ca one over my forehead, she bent me forward and pushed my head between my knees She knelt down, patted me on the back, and continued to press the cold washcloth to an to count in a low calm voice "One Two Three Four Five"

I took a breath with each nuot to sixty, I could breathe naturally again and sat back up

Heather shook her head and backed away, her eyes wide As she stuainst her seat, she plopped doith a thud and pressed the back of her hand to her face "Holy fuck, Sa you does that to you?"

I didn’t want to look in the , with concern in her eyes, I opened , but I couldn’t talk The lu I closedto do?

"You don’t…" She started and stopped "You don’t love hih me I raised my tortured eyes to her I couldn’t answer that No, I didn’t want to answer that because I hadn’t looked within myself yet

She watched me, studied me Whatever she saw in me answered her question, and she nodded "Okay I will help you hatever you need from me If you need me to play distraction, to use force, to blackmail someone, to burn a house down, I’ to happen" She stopped, hearing herself, and the blood drained from her face "You have any idea ould happen if this caan would want to kill each other"

Renewed pain went through me, but it doubled It had already felt like a thousand knives were in h uess you do"

Exactly