Page 39 (2/2)

My life is lonely, but I prefer it that way for thearound people hurts just as bad, if not worse, now that I knohat I am--know that my insanity can wear on them

I try not to think too much about Asher It’s too painful and it hurts in every part ofin ht, the memories of what happened there pull at my mind; when he rocked inside me, touched me, kissed me, made me feel alive even when death consumed me

I wander to the co to track down the author of the book Raven has His naust Millard, unless it’s his pen name I found an email address for a writer with the sauy, he’ll probably think I’m nuts Or maybe he’ll think I’m crazy either way; perhaps he’s a writer of words, not a believer of them

I check my inbox, but it’s eh the channels, searching through the news, looking for headlines about a body being found But the news isn’t on until later, so I shut the TV off and clean the house to distractonto You" by Story of the Year and block everything out I scrub every room downstairs and then arbage can out to the curb, and then I stand there taking in the neighborhood The sun is setting behind the es Leaves flutter frorass Across the street, Ms Courtney is rearranging her sprinklers and she glances up as she drags the hose across her yard I politely wave and her gaze darts down at the lawn, like I don’t exist She’s afraid of me still, just like everyone else in the town is because Laden and Mackenzie are still consideredpersons, but I know they’re dead

My eyes stray down the street to a two-story house with unn in the yard Every time I look at the house, I feel a pull toward it--toward hi him to come back It’s out of sheer insanity--I know that, and that’s what helpsAsher back, I would I tried a few ti to the wind for him to come to me "Asher, where are you?" I whisper "I need you I ht be in love with you The last one is just a thought and I never dare utter it aloud

"Hey, stranger" Raven’s brother, Todd, walks down the driveway and picks up the newspaper He’s wearing an old blue T-shirt with holes in it, plaid paja up like he just woke up "Thinking about buying a house?"

"Huh?" I collect the mail from the mailbox and step up onto the sidewalk

He se of the driveway "I saw you staring at that For Sale sign like you were about ready to rip it out of the lawn"

I align the envelopes against the pale of the lawn that separates our houses "Do you know anything about where he went?"

He shakes his head and glances at Caht? How he moved in and then a feeeks later the house went up for sale"

I shrug "You kno it is A lot of people can’t take Hollows Grove, like your sister"

"Yeah, she seems worse about it noith the," he makes a line across his neck, "with the scar on her neck She’s taking that one hard"

"She just needs to give it time to heal," I say, but deep down I knoill never fully heal After everything settled down, Raven started to res that she won’t always share with me

He taps the newspaper in his hand and nods his head at a car on the street "You think they’re ever going to give up, whatever it is they’re looking for?"

I turn around and give the cops in the patrol car a small wave They pretend not see me and eat their lunch

"I don’t think so," I say, turning back around to face Todd

"But why are they so fixated on our neighborhood?"

"I’m not sure… maybe they think someone here knohere Mackenzie is"

"Her fa up the newspaper and there’s a picture of Mackenzie’s face on the front page under the headline: Have You Seen Our Daughter?

Suddenly, a familiar man walks out of Cameron’s old house and heads down the path He has a pointy nose and a scrawny body and so up a ure out where I’ve seen hi closer at her faory--the one that was digging up the grave for hiht I first saw Cameron

"Ember," Todd says "Are you okay?"

I force e the topic "So ill Raven be co back?"

He backs down the driveway toward the front porch "Didn’t she call you?" he asks and I shake ht she went over to your house when she got here"

"No… I haven’t seen her since she left" It’s like a jigsaw puzzle coether: Raven is Ian’sa lot of private time with Ian while she was possessed by the Reapers

"Well, don’t take it too personally She’s been acting like a total lasses and having conversations with herself," he says when he reaches the steps