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The first couple days "at sea" I was in a stupor, still recovering Was it Saturday? Was it Tuesday? Was I disappointed either way? I co all the ti and I woke up, panicking, the reality that the Details piece was never going to run hitting hard, and I vaguely re about a lifeboat drill-a reht before when I came back from a crummy dinner in the Queen’s Grill Exhausted, I found the life jacket locked in solasses and ran-walked, hungover, along dozens of e to follow the directions on a badly Xeroxed map until I found a deck filled with old people ere huddled inrudely, annoyed by ive me a break" and muttered and muttered "It’s backwards, son," I was told by an officer, who struggled, fu, to untie the life jacket I had sloppily put on While I stood there, the officer said, "Don’t worry"-patting me on the shoulder as I flinched a dozen times-"you probably won’t need it" I offered hier for Kurt Loder, which he wasn’t

I wandered around on as left of e that I actually kept I did a little rehearsing, nailed a couple of scenes down, but they had already been shot, someone had already commented favorably on the dailies, so that whole enterprise could be construed as kind of a waste The elderly and Japanese were everywhere, surrounded me at miserable dinners I ate alone in the Queen’s Grill while staring at an issue of last azine because there were new photos by Jurgin Teller of Daniela Pestova conte rolls and a Corrine Day photo essay on lasses and the entire issue was filled with bruises and scars and underar improbably in front of empty 7-Elevens at dusk somewhere in the "heartland" and all I could think about, holding back tears and wincing, was: that should have beenin the ship’s Dolbyequipped auditoriu away thea thousand dollars’ worth of chips at the 21 table in what seee old couples sat on long couches everywhere, trying to co absolutely nowhere with, and I was always getting lost and I couldn’t find anything anywhere I’d finally locate one of the ship’s many bars and sit down, knock back a Mai Tai or four and s for my cabin wandered back to me At one of these bars I was so bored I even flirted with a young Ger y hious heart attack His response: "Ja?"

The next tie whirlpool bath in the spa and after that I sluggishly moved to the thalassotherapy pool and when I saw hi a little too confidently, I bolted toward a private inhalation booth, where I daydrea to do with the 300,000 F Fred Palakon had offered s that I almost passed out and had to be revived with a facial and an aromatherapy session administered by someone who looked like the Crypt-Keeper, as a Muzak version of "Hooked on a Feeling" was piped through the spa’s sound systeed and the camera would follow me at a discreet distance, shotsto light cigarettes, so an oversized Armani leather jacket I was told to look sad, as if I rettedapart I was encouraged to try and find Lauren in Miaiven the naned seasickness and those scenes were scrapped since they really weren’t in character anyway

The Dave Matthews Band’s "Crash into Me" played over the es the song was played over but it was "haunting," it was "e an "euess ere incapable of capturing ourselves At first ested other hts were sky-high and that the song was "too ominous" for this sequence; Nada Surf’s "Popular" had "too many minor chords," it didn’t fit the "ain-"too os could get anyoet very much more ominous, Victor," and then I wasleft alone