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This tirabbed his chest as the pain stabbed through it The attack on Josiah--the men who alanized the whole thing He didn’t knohy; didn’t fucking care, either

"Are you sure?" He wasn’t sure how he et the words out

"Yeah, and he wants to protect this shit Working with another gang against one of your own? That’s some fucked up shit"

Josiahbits and pieces of what he’d been told swam behind his eyelids The fear he’d no doubt felt, and what could have happened to hi

And Mateo, the night his lover was alone for years, working for the man who took Josiah away from him He felt like he would explode

Ben had said before that Javier was trying to get guns A lot of theotten it against the men who attacked Josiah "Kill him I want him dead I don’t care how you do it, but I want it to happen, now"

Tristan hung up the phone and went straight for the house He still struggled to breathe, struggled to see, but none of that mattered He needed to know they were okay, needed to be with them

Javier Javier had hurt them, had kept Mateo from Josiah for years after he’d almost killed their lover It would break Mateo to find out They would both lose Mateo if he did, Tristan had no doubt about that, because he kneould feel in the sahts were out in the apartment by the time Tristan made it home He snuck into their bedroom to see Josiah and Mateo both asleep in their bed Tristan watched the more than to climb in with theot about everything else Until the knowledge didn’tHe would much rather lose himself in the and thinking, and he kneasn’t in a place where he should be with theht now As raw as he felt, he wouldn’t be able to keep this from Mateo Christ, if Mateo found out, it would break him into a million pieces

Quietly he left the room and went to his office He sat in the chair, let it spin so his back faced the door, and leaned over, with his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands What the hell did he do? What the hell had he done? He was taking a life Wrong He was protecting as his But it could cost him his job if anyone found out--worse, it could land him in prison

Tristan startled when his cell vibrated in his pocket Pulling it out, this tiht for hi?" Tristan asked

There was a soft chuckle fro you that"

"You also don’t usually call this late What’s wrong, Ben?" He couldn’t handle so I’ve just been thinking about you lately I couldn’t sleep, and thought you’ve woken h over the years for me to return the favor Are you okay? You don’t sound like you were sleeping"

Tristan sighed No, he really wasn’t okay Words filled his head--Josiah’s pain over the years at having lost Mateo Mateo’s pain fro hurt Josiah, from the blood he still felt like dirtied his hands All because of Javier

"Are things okay with you and your men? Is that what you call them? I don’t kno to refer to Mateo Josiah has always been the boy to me, partly just because I know it pisses you off"

Tristan took a deep breath Thought about the things he’d spoken to Elliot about the past couple et to, so instead of telling Ben nothing rong, he started with the truth So his are hard With Mateo’s past, we’ve had to work around situations in a unique way We had a little hiccup in that today His PO came by I was here We played if off well, but I still had an unexpectedhim alive as well, which doesn’t help"

"Nice try, but that’s not what has you so upset Talk to me, Tristan"

How did Ben know him so hen he’d tried to keep himself so detached? What was he supposed to say? He couldn’t tell Ben any of itbut the words, the knowledge, already felt like acid eating away at him from the inside out