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His blue eyes were huge, and I could see his jaw clenching He cleared his throat Twice Then he sed hard Shit

"So keep the car, don’t keep the car, whatever I just wanted to do so nice for you, because I could" His voice wobbled a bit, and I couldn’t take it any his strong arht Aon Sweet boy

What the hell rong with ht with my favorite person on the entire planet

I pulled away just a s my hands on either side of his face I kissed one cheek, then the other, then his eyelids My lips caed inside, but all he saason ?" he asked

"Yep, and you are too," I said, handing hi like a Wallbanger grin It gets me every tilass Racing, Si rooh the rusty old caseain I checked Clive over, then slammed theshut

"I’ll keep the car if you fix that daer at Sier on Clive "And if you do that again, you go on catnip detox Permanently" He rolled his eyes atconvertible, which I ads you do for love

• • •

It was late, well after three in thefor what seemed like hours It was as if once I started, I couldn’t stop telling hi at work--I mean, how in the world could I ever say no to this? It’s such a great thing If I had to do this onit would take to try and build ner; there are very talented people who try to go it alone all the time, and it just doesn’t work for whatever reason"

He nodded, rolling over to be closer to me as I talked it out It helped

"But now, to be offered the chance to basically help run things? Per That Jillian has that kind of faith in me, you can’t knohat that feels like It’s a lot more work, sure, but I can do it I’d have to be crazy not to, right?"

He just showed me his teeth He knew better than to answer that one

"And then this house--it’s literally a dream come true Well, it will be when all the work is done But holy shit, it’s overwhelh a renovation like this is a pain in the ass! And I know it’s been tough on you too, being stuck here all day while it’s going on It’ll be worth it, though; this place is going to be a closer

I wanted to say the other things, the bigger pickle things, but I couldn’t It was as if I said the I had a proble you have a proble, but--

Actually Maybe that’s exactly what I needed to say Maybe I needed to give voice to the bigger issue here--the one that was so terrifying that I was even avoiding it in my own head What was my problem?

We met under very unconventional circumstances We fell in love in the most unconventional way possible The first time we made love? Conventional Didn’t work The first time we fucked? Definitely unconventional, ith all the flour puffing and the raisins Fucking fireworks, baby

And for a year we lived unconventionally He was gone, I was here We traveled together e could, seeing places and doing things I’d never i every single night; I liked having a bed to hed, we loved, we nooked And it worked

Noerecloser and closer to a more conventional relationship, which was packed with awesome, no doubt about it But it was almosttooshit I didn’t knohat it was I just knew I needed to say it out loud

I was once herded--very delicately, but herded nonetheless--toward a conventional relationship I didn’t want that So at so to have to share this pickle

"Keep this between us, okay, ave a soft meow, and nodded his head toward the stairs I picked him up and took him back to bed, where Simon was sound asleep in the remains of the blow-up bed

chapter twenty

I drove enerated quite a stir in the office, so with Jillian going over her proposal privately She didn’t want to worry anyone, and of course she didn’t want our clients to know until she was ready to announce her se and I sa it looked on paper, I ads as I’d done before, essentially taking over the day-to-day operations And since I made it clear that I still wanted to keep up within new business, it was also clear that ould need to hire another full-tiner

She told me to think it over, to talk to Simon about it, butI could say no to I mean, I could, but ould I ever want to?

So before we broke for lunch, I accepted her offer I was now a partner in Jillian Designs! We shook hands, popped a bottle of cha but throw our hats into the air like Mary Tyler Moore

Feeling a little on edge, from all the excitement, of course, I left work early and celebrated on my own that afternoon at World of Tile--favorite store ever It was time to select the all-ioodness, et excited about Let me tell you about my kitchen

White custo Deep gray soapstone countertops Sub-Zero fridge Tall ovens--count theels

Sing!

And it gets better A custom island with an inlaid sink, covered in white Carrarafor six on one side, with custo how tall to make the island was an exercise in ridiculous Si hts to see as the most comfortable I’m sure the entire cre exactly what he was up to, and I didn’t care I was getting the kitchen of my dreams, and if my boyfriend wanted to ht for sexy tiot dreamier

Itfor exactly the right tile Would it be subway? Would it be a glass design? I didn’t know exactly what I wanted until I saw it And then I turned the final corner and saw it

Or hi World of Tile And he was heading right for me

"Caroline, what a surprise," he called out Daood

"Hey, James" I smiled as I walked toward hin job last year His apart lawyer chic with an urban flair "What are you doing here?" I asked as he leaned in to give hed