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But the thought turned sour in uilt clawed its way up my throat I had trulyor any type of ache It had been lonely and passionless It hadn’t even felt like being married to a best friend; it had nearly felt like cohabitation with a colleague

What could I expect her to say that would change how I viewed any of that? Was I going just because, in my new happiness, I simply felt bad for my ex-wife?

I wanted to call Ruby before I went to dinner, to tell her that, no, Portia honestly had no chance, andof , but a dark and furtive part of me was simply curious: Portia had never in our relationship sounded as open and pleading as she had on the phone that et, for a fewin my flat for ed fro her to wait just a minute more, she’d already left

Even on the steps I could ses and peppers and thy-- of Brahms The front door was unlocked and still required the familiar shoulder shove--low kick combination to open

I bent to pet Davey as he ran across the floor tohis paws onbehind his ears

Hearing the clang of plates on the counter, I looked up Portia stood barefoot in our kitchen in casual cotton pants, a T-shirt, and an apron I blinked, ape I’d rarely seen the woman without her pearls

When she turned tos up a second glass of red wine fro to hand it to rasp and then stretched to kiss my cheek "Welcoht then It was disloyal, being here I felt like my skin had been replaced with da, and I knew it Ruby had known it

"Your holass down carefully on the sideboard "I live several Tube stops away"

She wavedup pasta into tls "I’ve still not seen your flat"

"There isn’t

Portia nodded to the dining roohtly I’d barely been here twome to the table as if I’d simply come home from work No reacquaintance, no small talk Certainly no playful banter