Page 52 (1/2)

"Oh, I like our chances," Pouncy said, his personality, such as it was, coonna go seventy-thirty us You?"

"More like even steven Fifty-fifty What are you going to do if it doesn’t work out?"

"Try again soround zero for this stuff Would you co to reassure hih I’irl"

"That’s what I like about you"

He played with her fingers on top of the scratchy hotel blanket, studying them

"Listen, I lied before," he said "I think I do knohy I’ this--what’s in it for me Or part of it It’s not about power for ood Julia propped herself up on an elbow, and the sheet slid down off her shoulders It was strange to be naked in front of Pouncy after all the tie to be naked in front of anybody It was like that cold water out there in the bay: scary, you didn’t think you could stand it, but then you plunged in and pretty soon you got used to it There was enough hiding in life Sometimes you just wanted to show somebody your tits

"I was in Free Trader before you You weren’t there when I came in"

"So?"

"So to be crude about it, you haven’t seen rinned, ruefully, a different se, I am the official all-time record-holder for Free Trader Beowulf At first they didn’t even think they were real"

"And they’re fordepression?"

He nodded "Ever notice how I never drink coffee? Or eat chocolate? Can’t Not with this much Nardil in my system I’ve had a half dozen courses of ECT I tried to kill myself when I elve My brain che terood in these moments, and she knew it Hesitantly she put her hand on his smooth chest It was all she could think of It seeh God, did he actually round can heal you? Like with As in, what he was saying This wasn’t an intellectual exercise for hihtly, like he didn’t care "I really don’t It would be a uess miracles are OLU’s business But to be honest I wasn’t thinking of it that way"

"How then?"

"If you laugh I swear to God that I will kill you"

"Careful, She "

"I’ll plead insanity I can back it up"

Pouncy’s face wasn’t a naturally expressive one His cut cheekbones ht have worked for a model, if he’d been a little taller, but never for an actor But for a second she could really see what he was feeling, as he felt it

"I want Her to take me home with Her," he said "I want Her to take h She understood that she was looking at another person like herself, a broken person, but Pouncy was evensorry for herself, and angry at other people She was less used to feeling sorry for someone else, but she felt it now She would never be in love with Pouncy, but she felt love for him

"I hope she does, Pouncy," she said "If that’s what you want, I truly hope she does But we’llshe hadn’t done since she’d gotten there in June She went online

None of thees It took theed every couple of months They raced each other, alone in their bedroo trash talk back and forth (Except for Failstaff, as too iant to talk trash, which may have contributed to his eventual victory As the router instead, so she could kick Pouncy offline at will) Once she was in Julia didn’t announce her presence--you didn’t have to, you could slip in without the syste everybody--because she didn’t want a blizzard of IMs fro absence For a couple of hours she just lurked, cruising through old threads, and new ones that had sprung up while she was offline There had been some turnover in the membership--there were a couple of new fish, and a couple of old fish were gone, or in hiding

It seemed like years since she’d been there She felt so much older now You could customize the Free Trader interface any nuone for a bare-bones look, ASCII characters only, approxi the look and feel of an olde-ti at everybody’s user naed since then, since she’d been living a life of quiet desperation in atime till she could take off for Stanford So ed here

Pouncy, As a private thread just like back in the day She checked in

[ViciousCirce has joined this thread!]

PouncySilverkitten: hey VC!

Asmodeus: hey

Failstaff: hey

ViciousCirce: hey

Electric silence for adamn show tomorrow huh?

ViciousCirce: er

As show if OLU shows up

Asmodeus: ouldn’t she?

ViciousCirce:

ViciousCirce: she ht be on the rag? there are 10K reasons why not just saying

PouncySilverkitten: yes but what about the mirror/silver coins/milk/etc???

Asmodeus: and she fixed my scar

ViciousCirce: yeah yeah yeah look I don’t want o be the asshole just, I’ve seen soods yet tho

PouncySilverkitten: but you do believe that there is a higher praxis

ViciousCirce: believe there ht be = why I’m still here

ViciousCirce: and anyway