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‘Sorry if I messed it up,’ Eleanor said

‘No mess,’ his mom said, ‘waterproof mascara and stay-put foundation’

‘Thank you,’ Eleanor said carefully ‘I could hardly believe the difference’

‘I’ll make you a kit,’ his mom said ‘These all colors I never use anyway Here, sit down, Park

I triy

…’

Eleanor sat in front of him and played Rock, Paper, Scissors on his knee

Park

She looked like a different person, and Park didn’t know if he liked it better Or at all

He couldn’t figure out why it upset her soto hide everything that was pretty about her Like she wanted to look ugly

That was so his mother would say

Which is why he hadn’t said it to Eleanor (Did that count as holding back?)

He got why Eleanor tried so hard to look different Sort of It was because she was different –

because she wasn’t afraid to be (Orlike everyone else) There was so near that, that kind of brave and crazy

‘Unsettling, how?’ he’d wanted to ask her

The next , Park took the onyx eyeliner into the bathrooht that ht look better More masculine

He looked in the mirror ‘This really make your eyes pop,’ his mom always told her custom-ers, and it was true The eyeliner did make his eyes pop It also made him look even less white

Then Park did his hair like he usually did –

flared up in theUsually, as soon as he did that, Park coain

Today he left it wild

His dad flipped at breakfast Flipped Park tried to sneak out without seeing hi his head over the cereal bowl

‘What’s wrong with your hair?’ his dad asked

‘Nothing’

‘Wait a minute, look at me … I said look at me’

Park lifted his head, but looked away

‘What the fuck, Park?’

‘Jame, Park?’

‘No excuse to cuss,’ his mom said She looked nervously at Park, like maybe this was her fault Maybe it was Maybe she shouldn’t have tried out lipstick saarten Not that he wanted to wear lipstick

…

Probably

‘Like hell it isn’t,’ his dad roared ‘Go wash your face, Park’

Park stayed where he was

‘Go wash your face Park’

Park took a bite of cereal

‘Jamie …’ his mom said

‘No, Mindy No I let these boys do prettythey da this house looking like a girl’

‘Plenty of guys wearabout?’

‘David Bowie,’ Park said ‘Marc Bolan’

‘I’ to this Wash your face’

‘Why?’ Park pushed his fists into the table

‘Because I said so Because you look like a girl’

‘So what else is new?’ Park shoved his cereal boay

‘What did you say?’

‘I said, what else is new? Isn’t that what you think?’

Park felt tears on his cheeks, but he didn’t want to touch his eyes

‘Go to school, Park,’ his mom said softly

‘You miss your bus’

‘Mindy …’ his dad said, just barely restrain-ing hirown up now, almost man, o’

His dad didn’t say anything; he’d never raise his voice to Park’s mom Park saw his opportunity and left

He went to his own bus stop, not Eleanor’s He wanted to deal with Steve before he saw her If Steve was going to beat the shit out of him for this, Park would prefer that Eleanor not be in the audience

But Steve hardly mentioned it

‘Hey, Park, what the fuck,onto his backpack

Everyone around Steve tittered, waiting to see ould happen next

‘You kind of look like Ozzy, man,’ Steve said ‘You look ready to bite the head off a fking bat’

Everybody laughed Steve bared his teeth at Tina and growled, and then it was over

When Eleanor got on the bus, she was in a good ht maybe you were sick when you weren’t at my corner’ He looked up at her She looked surprised, then sat down quietly and looked at her hands

‘Do I look like one of the Solid Gold dancers?’ he asked finally, when he couldn’t take any , ‘you look

…’

‘Unsettling?’ he asked

She laughed and nodded

‘Unsettling, how?’ he asked her

She kissed hiue On the bus

CHAPTER 36

Park

Park told Eleanor not to corounded He washed his face as soon as he got home and sent himself to his roorounded?’ he asked

‘I don’t know,’ she said ‘Did you have a good day at school?’

Meaning, did anyone try to flush his face down the toilet?

‘It was fine,’ he said

A couple of kids had called Park naht

Lots of other people said he looked cool

Hisday You could see her lipliner

She stared at a juures piled up on the shelf over his bed He hadn’t touched theirl? Is that what this about? Eleanor dress like boy You look like girl?’

‘No …’ Park said ‘I just like it I like the way it feels’