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…’

‘But, Mo Eleanor up the ladder to her bunk Then herEleanor’s ear ‘It was Richie,’ she whispered ‘There were kids playing basketball in the park, being loud … He was just trying to scare thes in the house – he could have been arrested No ht Not a breath’

She knelt doith the boys for a , then floated out of the roo Every one of the inside out She climbed out of her bed and in-to Maisie’s

‘It’s okay,’ she whispered to the room ‘It’s okay now’

CHAPTER 25

Park

Eleanor see while they waited for the bus When they got on, she dropped onto their seat and leaned against the wall

Park pulled on her sleeve, and she not-even-half slanced up at him ‘Now,’ she said

He didn’t believe her He pulled on her sleeve again

She fell against him and hid her face in his shoulder

Park laid his face in her hair and closed his eyes

‘Okay?’ he asked

‘Almost,’ she said

She pulled ahen the bus stopped She never let him hold her hand once they were off the bus She wouldn’t touch him in the hallways

‘People will look at us,’ she always said

He couldn’t believe that still mattered to her

Girls who don’t want to be looked at don’t tie curtain tassels in their hair They don’t wear olf shoes with the spikes still attached

So today he stood by her locker and only thought about touching her He wanted to tell her his news – but she seemed so far away, he wasn’t sure she’d hear hio this time?

Back to the Hickmans’?

‘Hey, reuys for a few days, and then she didn’t come back for a year? I really appreciate the fact that you didn’t turn me into Child Protective Services That was very Christian of you Do you still have that foldout couch?’

Fuck

Before Richie moved in, Eleanor only knew that word fro kids Fuck you, you little bitch – who the fk touchedthe last time

When Richie kicked her out

She couldn’t have seen it coht it could happen She never thought he’d try – and she never, ever thought her nized before Eleanor did that herto think about the day that it happened – e else – because it really was Eleanor’s fault She really was asking for it

She was in her roo lyrics on an old ht home from the Goodwill It needed new ribbon (Eleanor had a box full of cartridges that didn’t fit), but it still worked She loved everything about that typewriter, the way the keys felt, the sticky, crunchy noise they made She even liked the way it smelled, like metal and shoe polish

She was bored that day, the day it happened

It was too hot to do anything but lie around or read or watch TV Richie was in the living roootten out of bed until 2:00 or 3:00, and everybody could tell he was in a badaround the house in nervous circles, offering Richie lemonade and sandwiches and aspirin Eleanor hated it when her mom acted like that Relentlessly sub to be in the sa lyrics

‘Scarborough Fair’

She heard Richie co

‘What the fk is that noise?’ And, ‘Fuck, Sabrina, can’t you shut her up?’

Her mom tiptoed up the stairs and ducked her head into Eleanor’s roo well,’ she said ‘Can you put that away?’ She looked pale and nervous Eleanor hated that look

She waited for herabout why, Eleanor deliberately pressed a key

A

Crunch-lap

Her fingertips tre happened No one stirred The house was hot and stiff and as quiet as a library in hell

Eleanor closed her eyes and jerked her chin into the air

YOU GOING TO SCRABOROUGH FAIR

PARSLEY

SAAGE

ROSEMAYRY

AND

THYME

Richie ca In Eleanor’s head, he burst open the door by hurling a ball of fire at it

He was on her before she could brace herself, tearing the typewriter fro it into the wall so hard it broke through the plaster and hung for a moment in the lath

Eleanor was too shocked toat her FAT and FUCK and BITCH

He’d never come this close to her before Her fear of him crushed her back She didn’t want him to see it in her eyes, so she pressed her face into her hands in her pillow

FAT and FUCK and BITCH And I WARNED YOU, SABRINA

‘I hate you,’ Eleanor whispered into the pillow She could hear things sla softly, like she was trying to put a baby back to sleep

FAT and FUCK and BITCH and BEGGING

FOR IT, JUST FUCKING BEGGING FOR IT

‘I hate you,’ Eleanor said louder ‘I hate you, I hate you, I hate you’

FUCK THIS

‘I hate you’

FUCK ALL OF YOU

‘Fuck you’

STUPID BITCHES

‘Fuck you, fk you, fk you’

WHAT DID SHE JUST SAY?

In Eleanor’s head, the house shook

Herto pull her out of bed Eleanor tried to come with her, but she was too scared to stand up She wanted to flatten herself to the floor and craay She wanted to pretend that the roo Her mother pulled Eleanor to the top of the stairs, then pushed her down

He was right behind theainst the banister and practically ran to the front door on all fours She got outside and kept running to the end of the sidewalk Ben was sitting on the porch, playing with his Hot Wheels He stopped and watched Eleanor run by

Eleanor wondered if she should keep running, but where would she go? Even when she was a little girl, she never fantasized about running away She could never io? Who would take her?

When the front door opened again, Eleanor took a few steps into the street

It was just herquickly toward the neighbor’s house