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In thethat looks like worry
CHAPTER 11
Nathan is in the best mood I have seen him in And unlike the forced happy that we adopt in front of the ca smile painless in their delivery We sit outside; he orders aritas and beams at me across the table, his s in a bewildered response
"Jennifer Duripping o somewhere and celebrate Take the honeymoon we never took"
The honey we never had? I had assue ceremony was all the honey that the alcohol is on its ondering who this man is and what he has done with my serious, all-business husband "A honeyrin weakens a little, and he shrugs "The press would enjoy a honey"
I am able to mask arita, and glance around the restaurant I shouldn’t be irritated I should be grateful for the trip, for an opportunity to go somewhere with this beautiful man The mention of presssmiles, and soft caresses Photos mean a weekend like Napa -- a weekend that will break o?"
"Next month I have a land deal that I need to close first Once that’s taken care of, I will be able to take a couple of days off Plus, it will take soet you a passport" He picks up the ements I don’t like to take the plane out of the country"
I want to ask if Dreill be joining us, but worry the question will seelittle else
It is the first meal we have shared without others present We’ve had a couple of double dates -- arranged for business purposes -- dates on which Nathan was on his best behavior More cos -- a party, a dinner, a tour of a new develops are easy for us, the crowds allowing us to e of each other, our lack of inside jokes, pet names, and shared history For so already discussed, shared, co For us, silence is all we have ever known I do not speak because I do not knohat to say He does not speak because he has no interest in talking
"Does Nathan talk to you?" I a into eyes in the rearview mirror It’s the first question I’ve asked hierous behavior
His brow furrows "Talk?"
This is new -- an opening to discussion, souys spend a lot of tiether With me, he is always quiet Does he talk to you?"
"Yes We’ve known each other a long ti time That prompts a stack of new questions into decide which is most important, which he isme
"What did he say to you? At lunch?"
I blink, the question so foreign and strange I feel a childish urge to refuse to answer, to withhold the inforives o on a trip to the Caribbean" My hting up my body I had the entire meal to think about it: a trip, the island sun, cold frozen drinks, nights spent in Nathan’s bed, his hands on my body, mouth on my skin I have never been out of the country, have only seen ads on television showing peaceful sunsets, steel drum music, and couples who are head over heels in love
I snap out ofthat Drew has not spoken I look up, htness in his jaw alerting me that he is annoyed The emotion baffles me He keeps his face forward, then his jaw o?"
This is the first conversation that Drew has ever instigated Myto grasp this opportunity before talkative Drew slips away As thee, sorown atop one another, the ones on the top useless unless buried ones are also answered "Would you go?" The words jut out of my mouth, the question that I was too scared to ask Nathan, the question I need the answer to
He doesn’t respond, and the silence is unco, and thick "Nathan mentioned it was a business trip, and that you’d handle the arrangeht that maybe …" I desert the useless sentence I shouldn’t have to explainHe is still , the tension stifling in the car
"I don’t know if I a, but I typically don’t" He flexes his hands and tightens theo?"
I don’t kno I should feel at his words Elated that Nathan and I will have the time alone? That is the proper response Certainly the response that a colance out the , the city turning into suburbia, our Maybach catching the eye of ordinary life I al et a passport"
Darkening His reflection al of his eyes, the scowl across that face, the teer I have no idea where it is co from, and no idea at whom it is directed; I didn’t even ask a lot of questions I look out the , pressingto put distance betweenInside my mind, the questions screa es me to shut my eyes