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"What are you doing?"

My body was pressing her against the counter I began to kiss her neck "What do you think I’ froood" I was licking, tasting I wanted to drink her

"You’re scaring me I need you to leave"

"Say you’re her" Where were these words co? Was it me? "Say it Tellstrength, she shovedonknife from a drawer She aimed it at me like a pistol

"Get out"

Darkness was spreading insidethere?"

"I’ll screa bitch"

I lurched toward her What were my intentions? Who was she to me, this woman with the knife? Was she Liz? Was she even a person, or e of my wretched self? To this day, I do not know; the moment seems the property of another man entirely I do not say this to exonerate myself, which is impossible, only to describe events as accurately as I can With one hand I reached to cover herthe knife doard Our bodies collided in a soft crash, and then ere falling to the floor, my body on top of hers, the knife between us

The knife The knife

As we hit the floor, I felt it There was nothe sensation, or the sound it e to htreat, unrecallable act had been committed I rose from her body A pool of blood, rich and dark, al beneath it; more was on my shirt, a criirl’s sternuht She was looking at the ceiling; she let out a little gasp, no louder than a person would make who had suffered a mild surprise Isand that’s the end? Bit by bit, her eyes lost focus; an unnatural stillness eased across her face

I turned to the sink and vomited

The decision to hideI did not have a plan; I merely enacted one I did not yet think of myself as a killer; rather, I was a man who had been involved in a serious accident that would be irl’s blood had not seeped through I cast ht have touched The knife of course; that would have to be disposed of The front door? Had I touched the knob, the fraood-looking detectives co crime scenes for the minutest evidence I knew their prowess to be wildly overstated for dramatic purposes, but they were my only reference What invisible traces ofdown upon the surfaces of the wo to uilt?

I rinsed e The knife I cleaned as well, then wrapped it in my shirt and deposited it carefully in the pocket of ain; to do so would have been unbearable I scrubbed the counters and turned to appraise the rest of the apart?

I heard a sound, co? The deaths ofis the sound I heard

Details I had failed to notice earht toys of plush and plastic strewn across the floor The distinctive, fecal aroma masked by sweet powder I re The ti of her departure had been no accident

The sound caain; I wanted to flee but could not That I had to folloas my penance; it was the stone I would carry for life Slowly Ih the partly open door The odor grew stronger, coating my mouth with its taste At the threshold I paused, petrified, yet knoas required ofabout Six s A led above her crib She aving her ar the aniain, a joyful little squeal See what I can do? Mama, come look But in the other roo into time’s abyss