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Rose tilts her head, conte me "When is he supposed to leave for New York?"

She’s not stupid; she knohy I’ back, though I haven’t mentioned to her that I don’t really have a true home there That I just stay at Cash’s apartment because he lets me She doesn’t even know Cash exists She doesn’t know much about my private life at all and for once, I’

But she’s also naked andto stay firmly fixed on her face It’s so damn hard I’ve had her every which way We’ve had so iven out on me yet, I’ve worked it so hard

Yet I take one look at her, naked and still flushed from her warm shower, and I want to jump her Push her onto the bed and slide inside of her There is nowhere else I’d rather be than with Rose

Everything inside of oes cold That is about the scariest revelation I’ve ever had Because I don’t do commitment, I don’t do relationships, and I definitely don’t do love I don’t even think I kno to love

I could learn, though For Rose

Fuck no, you can’t You’re a worthless piece of shit who doesn’t deserve a woman like Rose When she finds out the truth, she’ll kick your ass to the curb

That’s an even scarier revelation

"I’ yet," I lie "It’ll be soon, though" Dairl I need to tell her the truth It’s just so hard to co you in two days Sorry to take off like this, but hey It’s been real

I don’t kno to end this Or continue it, either She should be going back to New York soon too, but I don’t think she wants to go Late at night, e’re both exhausted and drifting off to sleep, she talks of staying in London Orat Fleur; it sounds more that she wants to explore Europe and be on her own for a while I think she’s trying to find herself

And I can’t help her do that How can I when I don’t even knoho I really ao, and I was thankful for the dark So she wouldn’t see the mixture of hope and horror that surely crossed my face

I never did answer her Like a wi now Yet I still lie like the hustler I a that … hell, it wrecks , start to reach for her, but she turns away and I droplike I soo back too Eventually," she says as she slips on a pair of skimpy black lace panties Her back is still to oes about her preparations She pulls a black lace bra from the drawer and hooks it on I could spend a lifetiet bored "I have to face my father sometime"

"Are you scared to face him?" Like I’m scared to face you? I don’t want you to find out oes still, her hands dropping to her sides, her head bent alain, vulnerability and sadness etched across her face "Yes He’s going to give me the ‘I’m so disappointed in you’ speech I’ve heard it before and he knows I hate it But I have to do this I can’t work there any longer I’ my wheels at Fleur"

"Are you sure that’s what you want to do?" I ask "Quit Fleur for good?"

She lifts her chin, defiant "I’ve thought long and hard about this I’ to do it" The last few nights we’ve talked, tentatively revealing things Personal details, though nothing ever too incredibly deep, especially co from me I’ve listened to her talk for hours about Fleur, her father, her father’s skanky girlfriend whom he just asked to marry hi leaving Fleur but I thought it was just talk

Guess not

She nods, her eyes di the word quit can’t be easy "I don’t knohat else I can do I can’t go back there and continue on as if nothing’s wrong I’ll be too ive up on the fa you’ve worked toward since you were a kid" I can’t believe it I would never call Rose a quitter She’s so deter Like I told her a couple of weeks ago, she’s got passion

She’s also been handed an opportunity so many would kill for--hell, I would kill for it My fa Me and Morandmother, and who kno ot shit

"There’s aze slides away frouess I don’t understand why you would trash your career and a job you love all over a woman you don’t like All because you feel underappreciated" I shake oad her on purpose?