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She shrugged "I don’t I told you it was fun Grey seeh for her, I think, but she’s doing a lot better overall"

"I noticed," Charlie mumbled so softly I almost didn’t catch what she said

I pushed away from the counter and crossed raduation you couldn’t wait to see her, and now that you’ve hung out with her, you soundI don’t know, disappointed or so she seemed fine" Her voice was still monotone, and one eyebroas raised as she stared across the kitchen at nothing

My head was spinning I hated arguing with Charlie, and didn’t like that we’d just gotten into it again about the whole college thing But the way she’d looked then was completely different from how she looked now She looked exactly how she sounded and how I’d explained it to her Disappointed And I wasn’t sure if so had happened with her and Grey, or if Grey had broken down today I hadn’t talked to Grey after, so it was possible--and the thought wasme anxious I needed to be able to make sure Grey was okay, but I couldn’t do that whenthe way she was

"Okay, I know soht now, just talk tohappen with Grey, yes or no?"

Charlie sat back in the bar stool, folding her ar, and nothing happened It’s just what I said, Grey’s fine," she reiterated, then whispered, "She’s just fine"

I let"What a weird as shit about her, so I know so’s up!"

My sister studiedJust before I asked again, she blurted out, "Grey’sever happened She’s fine and I don’t kno she can just go on acting like Ben never--like he neverto her"

My s "What? That’s what all this has been about?" When she didn’t say anything, I asked, "Charlie, how can you say that? She--she lives hat happened every day It killed her, but she’s getting stronger, she’s trying to continue living her life like Ben would want her to I’to wrap"You should be proud of her Does it bother you how I’er, but that’s different!"

"How is it any fking different, Charlie?" I yelled, and threw ht in front ofwhat Ben would want us to It’s been two--"

"She was going to marry him!" she snapped, and I took a step back Charlie never reacted like this, but then again, I never usually yelled at her "I just don’t understand how she could go on acting like the guy whoto her never existed just because he died"

I ground, Charlie Don’t hold it against her for continuing to live"

Charlie sed thickly and nodded as she slid off the bar stool Grabbing her purse, she turned to leave, and just before I could ask why she was leaving, she looked back at uy who alanted to take Grey froether, Jag Always" Her eyes brightened with unshed tears, and she offeredfor the day she would see the life you wanted to give her But she chose Ben, and now she’s acting like he was never even here"

"You have no idea what you’re saying You haven’t seen what she goes through every day"

"Tell me this, ould Ben say if he were here, huh? If he saw you two together all the ti, and Charlie nodded

"That," she choked out, and cleared her throat, "that is what I’m not okay with"

I watched as she walked out of the building, and didn’t try to stop her She couldn’t have been , but I didn’t knohat to say to make her understand I didn’t knohat to say, period I’d never seen my sister respond this way, especially to Grey It didn’tto Grey

Grabbing my keys, I ran out tountil her voice mail picked up I stopped just outside the driver’s-side door, rested my elbows on top of the hood of ot her voice -can-touch-me voice that had always been distinctly Grey before Ben died

Without leaving a ot into my car and drove to her parents’ house, but didn’t stop when I didn’t see her car out front If she wasn’t answering her phone and wasn’t there, there were only two places I could think of where she would be

I was just hoping it wasn’t the ceh town, I tried her cell oneher voice mail, I turned off onto an old, familiar path I took what felt like my first real breath since Charlie had left my place, when I found Grey’s car parked out near the lake and pulled up next to it Turning off my car, I looked over at the short dock for a fewhts ere growing up