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Lia reached the edge of the tub, saw her shirt hanging by a peg on the changing screen, as well as the girdle Ellowyn scrubbed thoroughly at one of her bracers "If I had a fortune, the Earl of Dieyre would wish to marry ood looks The Pry-rians want e that would bewilder lory" She scrubbed a little furiously at a particularly muddy spot "A vessel That is all that I am to them Like that water dish to rinse your hair"
Lia saw Ellowyn in a neay and it startled her a little "You almost sound resentful of your new life," she said
"Resentful? No…I a but sheer terror since I left Sefall Abbey I miss it dreadfully" She squinted at the dark leather and scratched out a stain with her fingernail "I plucked from your home, then shuttled forth from place to place, Abbey to Abbey Learn this Say that Eat this way Do not laugh like that It is not proper What is taking you so long? We learned that word yesterday, you still have not learned it?" Her face twisted into a scowl "Never a moment to myself Never a moment to say what I really feel Except ed
"I do not care If I do not talk, I will burst This is hoould work at st ourselves Talk about the boys and which ones liked us and which ones we scorned I miss that I miss it dreadfully Marciana does not understand me Colvin does not understand me But you do How I amuch better, I think I would trade these dirty clothes of yours for s mock me Truly, they do The Medium will not hearken to me, no matter how I plead with it No matter that my parents were both skilled I cannot do it because I a to try and takeI do not want to do To marry someone I do not know just to bear their child And that in my fear, I will let them I will do whatever I am asked, because I a on her thumb a moment, then put down the bracer and seized the other one She looked sidelong at Lia "So…you love hi in her words "You care for hiirl s with zest "How can I not, Lia? He is so different than other htful and wise for so He is never rude or conceited I refall You should have seen the gaggle of us at the laundry after they rode in Most of the girls thought Edmon the prettiest boy they had ever seen, but he did not catch my fancy It was the Earl of Forshee – so stern and poised A dark beauty He fears nothing Absolutely nothing I fear everything unless he is nearclosely She knehat Colvin feared She knew so many of his inner secrets, his qualms
"I was elbow-deep in suds…just like nohen he came with the Aldermaston My name was Hillel Lavender Did you know that? There was Colvin and the Alder at us and it was quiet, except a few nervous giggles Before the Aldermaston said my name, he looked at me His eyes – how do you describe the slightly, as he often does But his eyes just burned into mine, as if he kneho I was The Alderine the jealousy and the whispers e left In the Aldermaston’s study, Colvin told me my true name Ellowyn not Hillel The Aldermaston warned ould happen if I left the Abbey He said the old king had sworn the raze the Abbey if I was revealed in any way" She looked sidelong at Lia "It is a guilt that I carry And a fear What would I do if they burned the Abbey…because of me? Colvin swore an oath he would protect fall I swear I fell in love with hiuard ht, though He does not love you, she wanted to say, but she could not bring herself to utter it
"Though I am afraid, I feel calm when he is near He has tried to help me learn how to summon the Medium, but in truth, it is even harder to try when he is nearat his mouth, his hands, his eyes He speaks so passionately, I want to succeed just to please him But he has never once uttered a breath that he cares about me He will ask if I am thirsty Or tired Or if my stomach ails me But he does not confide in me, as he does with Ciana Or you" The last was added with a hint of bitterness "I wish I could be as outspoken as you, Lia You never fear to say what you are thinking It serves you well I always fear I will be misunderstood, so I say not much at all"