Page 33 (1/2)

“I don’t know It keeps changing They had to order a part fro look “So you’re secretly relieved, right?”

“No! Why would I be relieved?”

“Colad to have the excuse not to drive”

I start to protest, but then I stop There’s no use Josh knows me too well “Well, maybe I’m a teeny-tiny bit relieved”

“If you ever need a ride, you know you can call me”

I nod I do know that I wouldn’t call hiency

“I ht next door It’s way ive you a ride to school than him I mean, it’s , and Josh scratches the back of his neck “I want to say so it up Which is also weird, because we’ve always been able to talk to each other”

“We can still talk to each other,” I say “Nothing’s changed” That’s the biggest lie I’ve ever told hier than the lie about o Josh thought I had a twin sister named Marcella who died of leukemia

“Okay I feel likeI feel like you’ve been avoiding oing to say it I look down at the ground

“Ever since Margot broke up with me”

My head snaps up That’s what he thinks? That I’ot? Did my letter really make that little of an impact? I try to keep my face still and expressionless when I say, “I haven’t been avoiding you I’ve just been busy”

“With Kavinsky I know You and I have known each other a long time You’re one of my best friends, Lara Jean I don’t want to lose you, too”

It’s the “too” that’s the sticking point The “too” is what stops me in my tracks It sticks in my craw Because if he hadn’t said “too,” it would be about ot

“That letter you wrote—”

Too late I don’t want to talk about the letter anymore Before he can say another word, I say, “I’ll always be your friend, Joshy” And then I smile at him, and it takes a lot of effort It takes so much effort But if I don’t smile, I’ll cry

Josh nods “Okay Good Soso can we hang out again?”

“Sure”

Josh reaches out and chucks ive you a ride to school tomorrow?”

“Okay,” I say Because wasn’t that kind of the whole point of this? To be able to hang out with Josh again without that letter hanging over our heads? To just be his good friend Lara Jean again?

After dinner I teach Kitty how to do laundry She resists me at first, but I tell her that this is a job we are all sharing frooes off, that et wrinkled”