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“What? Why are you asking me that?”

She looked away, visibly eht about it I’ the label from his bottle of Saain

“Is that so you think about a lot? Our first time?” Paul cared about Ali and didn’t want to make her feel bad He didn’t want her to be ashamed of their past He sure as hell wasn’t

“Um, don’t you?”

“You broke up with ain “Where are you going with this?”

“I just wondered if you ever thought aboutto do—tortureabout you like that, otherwise” Noas his turn to look es, resting her cheek on her knees Her eyes found his in the firelight and she looked so lost So sad

Paul shifted to stare into the flames

“What do you think about?” he asked at last

“The way you smell The way you sound when you whisper in ave him a half-smile “You don’t look at me like that anymore

“I understand why It washappens for a reason” Paul kept his eyes fixed resolutely on the fire

“Maybe I just wish I could take it back That I wasn’t so stupid”

“The long-distance thing was tough for uments”

“Yes, they were”

“I’ that, okay? You did what you thought you should do I got over it End of story”

“But that’s what I’m most sorry about,” she whispered

“What?”

“The fact that you got over it”

Their eyesin her eyes

She brushed at theood memories, happysoain”

“You dated a guy naether but not anymore He ”

She pillowed her cheek on her knees again “He was nice enough, but not as nice as you”

“Did he hurt you?” Paul’s tone ary

“No But e had sex he wouldn’t look at me He always kept his eyes closed I never felt like he was really there, you know? I felt like I could have been anybody Any girl he’d taken hoirlfriend”

“Ali, I—”

She interrupted hiht up our first tiet to know each other really well before we had sex How you booked a hotel just down the road for our first time” Her expression istful “You always made me feel special, even before you told me you loved me”

“You are special”

She looked at him steadily