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Ben took the collection of shopping bags fro son This was a totally new side of hi to watch

"Can I take you for a drink?" Ben asked, gazing at me steadily "I’m not ready to let you disappear yet"

"I don’t think that’s a good idea"

"Oh, honey, it’s one drink Your friend can even come" Dakota motioned to Todd

"Actually, this is too weird forto bail Can you get a ride ho to turn tail and run

"Henry will take you anywhere you’d like to go," Ben said

I nodded to Todd, too nuant bar on the Upper East Side I sat in between Ben and his mom Dakota ordered ashe was stillback into old habits, I allowed Ben to order io

"Have you eaten?" he asked, keeping his eyes on mine I shook my head I’d expected to have lunch with Todd, but that hadn’t happened "A couple of menus, please," Ben said to the bartender

We ordered lunch and nibbled on grilled tuna and spring salad whilesmall talk Ben’s mom was actually lovely and sweet I didn’t knohat I’d been expecting, but e had calmed her It was obvious that she loved her son deeply Even if she hadn’t been theup She fussed over hi hi would’ve looked beautiful on her" Dakota shook her head, looking at ? My heart tripped incouldn’t have? Could he?

His jaw tensed and he briefly shook his head in an attempt to silence his aze was cast doard into his glass of scotch Frown lines creased his forehead as he swirled the aht

I wanted to say so, to ask what she meant, but of course I couldn’t The words dried up in et ain I tried to take stock of how I even felt about this It hat I’d wanted all along--a co that he had considered proposing-- it official-- we’d been through--Fiona’s desperate atte him over and his sex-tape scandal, I didn’t know if too much trust had been broken But my heart didn’t think so Whether or not I wanted to, I still loved hi hi past thisthat would take ti anytime soon

Ben’s posture told me the conversation was done but when he waved to the bartender, signaling for the check, I knew things were final I got up and excused hts before facing hiiveaway of the e inside me Half of me wanted to slap him; the other half wanted to throw o It was still a question of which half would win

19

Ben

E in her neck toldexcited her And that fact roared through er? Would she say yes if I asked? Would she throw herself into ht be a chance to win her back made my heart kick up a notch There was only one way to find out And she was sitting here having a drink withna her, et home safe and sound Not that assle He didn’t care about her, didn’t love her like I did She wasup in theshe’d call If she hadn’t wanted to see me, she would have left Emmy wasn’t too shy to refuse ht

I could only hope that she’d change her mind, understand that the mistakes of my past were done If she’d just let ht help But I wasn’t about to discuss ht next to us I needed just one ood one

The thought consu to keep ame face in place, I requested the check I needed ti think Sort this mess out Probably talk to Bray And I sure as shit needed to talk to my mom She should not have said what she did

The three of us wandered fro on the sidewalk for Henry to arrive when my mom excused herself to use the restrooe to pull her body into ive iven you lots of chances"

"I know And I need just oneit over "I had to find out at the sa in an adult film I hated that"