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Colin let out a long breath The conversation was notin the direction he'd hoped He certainly hadn't intended for her to throw his earlier insistence that she not tell anyone about her secret life back in his face "If you hadn't published that last column," he said, "ouldn't be in this position, that is true, but the point is now moot, don't you think?"wColin," she whispered "If you tell the world I'mLady Whistledown, and they react the e think they will, you'll never see yourjournals published"

His heart stood still

Because that hen he finally understood her

She had told him before that she loved him, and she had shown her love as well, in all the ways he'd taught her But never before had it been so clear, so frank, so raw

All this ti him not to make the announceainst the luht even for breath

She reached out and touched his hand, her eyes pleading, her cheeks still ith tears "I could never forgive myself," she said "I don't want to destroy your dreams"wThey were never my dreams until I met you," he whisperedwYou don't want to publish your journals?" she asked, blinking in confusion "You were just doing it forless than complete honesty "I do want it It is ave me"wThat doesn't mean I can take it aYou're not"wYes, I--"

'No," he said forcefully, "you're not And getting my work publishedwell, it doesn't hold a candle tothe rest of my life with you"wYou'll always have that," she said softlywI know" He smiled, and then it turned rather cocky "So what do we have to lose?"wPossibly uess"wAnd possibly less," he reerton And you are now, too We wield a bit of power in this town"

Her eyes widened "What do you ive you his full support"wYou told Anthony?" she gaspedwI had to tell Anthony He's the head of the family And there are very few people on this earth ould dare to cross hi all this And then, because she had to knoWhat did he say?"as surprised"wI expected as much"wAnd rather pleased"

Her face lit up "Really?"wAnd amused He said he had to admire someone who could keep a secret like that for so many years

He said he couldn't wait to tell Kate"

She nodded "I suppose you'll have to make an announcement now The secret is out"wAnthony will hold his counsel if I ask hi to do hy I want to tell the world the truth"

She looked at hi on her hand and pulling her close, "I', and it was so strange, because just a few ain

He leaned down until his nose touched hers "I want everyone to kno proud I ale person in London who doesn't recognize how clever you are"wThey reed, "but that will be their problehed "I do love you It's an excellent thing, really"

He grinned "I knoNo, I really do I thought I loved you before, and I' like what I feel noGood," he said, a rather possessive glea in his eyes, "that's the way I like it Now co open a door

To Penelope's a the entire ballroo to yank him back into the darkened room behind them No one had seen them yet; they could still make their escape

'Tsk tsk," he scolded "Bravery,in the paper?" she whispered urgently "Or just tell sorand gesture to get the point across"

She sed convulsively As gestures went, this was going to be grand "I' the center of attention," she said, trying to remember how to breathe in a normal rhythm

He squeezed her hand "Don't worry I am" He looked out over the crowd until his eyes found those of their host, his brother-in-law, the Duke of Hastings At Colin's nod, the duke began to aspedwI told him when I arrived," Colin murmured absently "How do you think I kne to find the roo happened A veritable fleet of foot tall flutes of chaly, picking up two glasses that aiting in the corner "Just as I asked"

Penelope took hers silently, still unable to co around herwIt's probably a little flat by now," Colin said in a conspiratorial sort of whisper that she kneas meant to set her at ease "But it's the best I could do under the circumstances"

As Penelope clutched Colin's hand in terror, she watched helplessly as Sioers to turn their attention to his brother and sister on the balcony