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I heard hiers as he lowered hiainst the table He rested his ar out in the air He didn’t say anything at all, waiting forin himself; I didn’t know

"He said he made you swear on your life not to tell me," he said, his voice hoarse "That I should blame him, not you"

"Yeah, but I could have told you anyway," I said quietly

"But you didn’t"

"I didn’t"

He let out a sound of frustration, running his hands back through his hair "Rubycan you at least helpet why no onewhy neither of you even tried"

"It’s becauseI knohat it feels like to" I struggled for the right words, but every tirip on them, they slipped away "It’s different for us--for hierous ones I know you don’t want to hear that, I’m sorry, but it’s true I saw it in the way the PSFs treated the Orange and Red kids at Thurled to learn to control her abilities, and I see it in the face of every kid I talk to So I knew exactly why Cole didn’t tell you or your parents I lived with the fear of being found out, and so did he First with your faue had any idea?" Liam asked in disbelief

"Three people knew," I said "Alban, Cate,his head

"I wish I was better at this--at explaining I just kept thinking about how I had to keepSix years And then just like that, in a et us away from that woman It was somehow the hardest and easiest decision I’ve ever made, because it meant you would all be safe, but I was so sure it would be over and I’d lose the three of you because you knew"

"Youin the woods, after the skip tracer tried to take us in," he said, fitting the rightto leave you behind"

"Yes" There was a sharp ache in my chest as I said, "But you talked to me, you told me that you all wantedalone inside of your head for so long It changed my life And I know it sounds stupid, but I think part of et to the point where he wasn’t so damn asha one of us so he wouldn’t be so alone It didn’t seeht, you know? He’s still trapped in this in-between space Not one of us, but not one of the adults"

"That was by choice," Liam said "He could have told us"