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Scarlet

BLEACH AND FRIED food, that’s what I sht when I walked into the trailer I now called home, I immediately stripped off my clothes and tossed them into the washer The trailer was small, more like a camper trailer, but the rent was cheap Maybe tiny was a better description The aro and h the tiny habitat smelled of mildew I didn’t need to add the stench of my work environ I was lucky this toent to bed early Getting hoet the food s to bed and doing it again the next day

Seven days a week Fifteen hours a day Six to nine, nine-thirty if I had to clean-up after close The tips weren’t terrible, better than I had expected I was paying for ed to save enough to start classes in the fall at the junior college in the next town

My work hours would be cut back if I took classes, but Ethel--ht Eyes Diner--said that the su town It was shway that ran right through it was the road that led to Alaba us with lots of summer traffic

If I worked the same hours, I would be able to afford both se to be able to work in a diner my entire life and didn’t want to be stuck in Robertsdale I knew I couldn’t go houys finally caused me to run My mistake with the Sutton boys wasn’t whatout of that house Away from my mother and the darkness that would always be there Now that I was out of that house, away frohts weren’t so dark I wanted to find a life for myself and to learn to live happy

I stopped at the kitchen bar after droppingto get the greasy food smell off my skin, I paused to pick up the white invitation that hadn’t left hts since I received it in the mail last week I used a post office box for my phone bill and my best friend, Dixie Monroe I trusted her, but I didn’t trust her not to break down and search for me if she had my real address Dixie would never understand this trailer and why I wanted this How living here was so much better than what I’d left behind Because Dixie never really knew me No one did

I looked at the invitation every day The RSVP card was still there, unreturned There was a short, handwritten

Going wasn’t an option for me I should have been the s since ere thirteen I would stand by her and she would forWe’d marry brothers and live next door to each other Our kids would grow up best friends and our holidays would always be shared I’d have a large Christmas party at my house and they’d all come When I say all, I mean the Sutton boys, their wives and kids--that was the fantasy One I went along with I’d s that wasn’t inbefore I’d becoht I’d run because of what had happened between Brent, Bray andtwo Sutton boys instead of one had been a mistake, but it wasn’t why I left My reasons were darker than that Dixie thought I should co, loved two Sutton boys, but she hadn’t screwed it up the way I had She’d loved two of them at different times and hadn’t hurt them She hadn’t been with one brother and cheated on him with his twin No, thatBray Sutton had been right there with otten so consu else Not even the da I only saw Bray

I’d never been in love with Brent Only Bray My heart still squeezed so tightly I lost ne Bray ined I had been ruined, twisted, long before hi things with boys when I was eleven years old, in an atte to take the numbness away

Bray hadsoed I didn’t want to be like her I ay fro in a sketchy part of town because I needed to save to go to college I was alone and that gave me relief from the heaviness that was a constant in my chest

Christmas Day, I had eaten leftovers from work and sat at the table in the tiny kitchen I was currently standing in It was the happiest Christmas I’d ever had There was no pain or tears No sadness and fear I knewhad saved Brent and Bray It had also saved iven Bray Dixie had es She said they were both dating again Brent was happy He’d moved on Bray was never happy It was just his way The constant cloud over him was one reason I was drawn to hiry He didn’t want to sh to not hide his issues I wanted to be like that

With the sa invitation for Dixie Monroe and Asher Sutton, I’d set it back down on the empty bar counter I wanted to see Dixie irl Like me, she fell for another Sutton boy for a time, but she hadn’t been in love with Steel Sutton She had always and would always be in love with Asher

Now, she was getting the h I also felt jealousy and pain I didn’t have that dream Hopefully one day I could build a drea me joy, because all that had felt remotely close to joy hen Bray Sutton touchedup each day and facingto Until that crumbled too

"I wish I could come, Dixie," I whispered to the four walls around me "But I can’t see hiain"

The Sutton boys wereon with their lives and were the way they should be No one was fighting, no rift between them My return would cause issues They didn’t need to seethe invitation, I went into the bathrooh for one My hands could touch all four walls with ainst my ribs while I stood in the center of the space and spun around The water took three h it never reached hot, it did get warm for about five minutes I had to hurry to wash and rinse my hair and body before it turned cold First, it was a waiting gas like this were new to ed to others looking fro, accepting a sports car from the man I had called father The day I drove away, my mother had three words for irls, but those words were nothing She’d already done her dao