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"I don’t want a relationship either, so what’s the problem?"

"Jared, I can’t sleep with so that for the past three years"

"I see women as possessions?"

"You have three constantly tucked in a little aparthed and shook his head, still confused "Soyou’re saying that you ignore that you want et rid of the to me You see women as possessions – that is the proble so judgemental about this? I’m not the only one who has consorts Antonio has the me to sleep with hiuards have them"

"Yeah, and a lot of them don’t Sebastian doesn’t either Your brother doesn’t"

He halted his pacing and his irises glowed red "Whoa, wait a minute, what does-"

"Co the lared atto see through me And then a smile – it wasn’t a nice one – crept onto his face "Knohat I think, Sam?" He walked toward me stealthily, his eyes narrowed "I think it’s just been that long for you since your body and yourinvolved from anybody else that you don’t knohat to do It scares the hell out of you, doesn’t it?"

He was right up close to , to be truthful At the sa to reach out and cal about myself that I hadn’t really wanted to see I was – huether – twenty-three years oldand I didn’t kno to handle so as basic as desire any it "Can you honestly bla to feel like sole time he touched me I felt sick, dirty, and sometimes I wanted to die So excuse me if I don’t want to sleep with so but sexual outlets just the same way that he did!"

Jared pointed hard atlike hiain, or to my brother I’ll tell you what, Sam" – he said s easy for you: right now is the last time we’ll ever talk about this I’ll never coet on with your celibate lifestyle and I’ll get on with shagginghts that I didn’t want at the forefront of s that I didn’t want to feel If I – a vampire, a creature that was naturally sensual – couldn’t even cope with desire then I was basically broken, wasn’t I? I hated Victor so ht now And Jared Actually, no, I didn’t hate him I hated that he was so infuriated withbad of me I hated that I’d hurt him How could I have co hi; I wasn’t weighing up as the better brother to be with I didn’t want to be with either of the only toother people

Well, I got what I wanted So why didn’t it feel as liberating and co as it should?

Chapter Six