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David shifts in his chair and hides behind the Brattleboro Reformer "I just need some time"

"But I want to understand I want to help It’s been five months, but you resist me at every turn"

David rises and stands over me, his fists balled "You can’t understand You weren’t there You fucking weren’t there! In one day twenty thousand soldiers were killed in battles around the world It was a fucking horror hthtmares--a s, horrified by some vision he saw The first ti a German soldier and belted ht I’d broken my arm, but it was just bruised I was stunned, couldn’t comprehend what had happened

"Do you want a divorce?" I finally got upto church It seemed a safe time to broach the subject Surely, he wouldn’t explode in public I rong

"No, I don’t want a divorce!" He stops on the sidewalk in front of the rectory "I just want so Don’t you get it? Men were killed right in front of ed their bloody bodies out of the trenches, tried to save them as they suffered Sometimes I wish I’d died with theh sidewalk and fall into the street

The worst part was that Mrs Stopper, the pastor’s wife, and her three daughters, dressed to the nines, were just co down the rectory’s front walk They stopped with shocked faces, turned around, and hurried back inside

Once hoized, wept on his knees like a character froive hiot worse A slap here, a punch there He was always angry If not atsorocer for o an ite relative, who called to check on him once every few days

Three weeks after the scene in the street, David had another dreaht

"No! Stop! Stop!" By this tihbors would hear, I hurried to his bed to wake hi rabs ht him off I yank his thick beard, tear at his hands We roll off the bed, crash to the floor, and the is hi down our faces, we lay there panting

"This can’t go on," David groans "One of these nights I’ll kill you" He crawls to the chest of drawers and pulls out a pistol wrapped in a pair of army underwear "Here, you must sleep with this revolver under your pillow If I coht, shoot meDon’t threaten! Shoot me Do you understand? If you plead with me, I won’t stop"

"David! I couldn’t!"

"You have to I’ on his clothes, first his pants, then his shirt Forgets the boxers