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His hand tightened around mine "Well, we have learned a lot in the past coupleI’ve learned, anyway, is that this is a work in progress--that we keep working on it and we don’t let things build up and fester That we can’t be afraid to talk about it"

"And we don’t give up…even when things look i breath "Well, this certainly felt io And I’m sure it won’t be easy But it sure as hell is worth it"

We dressed and had a late dinner at the Beachcoes and illuhts We were like new lovebirds, holding hands over the table while we talked about trivial stuff Ada our mutual friends while I’d been up in Anza He didI listened, nodded and keptsecret to er that I could

After coffee, Ithe beach, and I thought I’d have to bethe check, alked out to where the waves were breaking against the shore, where the sand was packed tighter now that the tide was low and an al an otherworldly glow over the sand and water

When we got as far as the tide pools--not far from the spot where our relatives had married each other earlier that day, he turned to me "We still have a lot to talk about, you know I didn’t want to be the downer to bring all that up, but…"

I stopped, nodding "I know I agree" He pulledand I kissed his cheek "But first I have so to ask you"

"Sure Go ahead," he said

"Well, it has to do with…respawns"

"Huh?"

I cleared my throat "A do-over My do-over"

He still clearly did not understand "Ue, I sed my fear, took both of his hands inside hed for a hter died out when I looked up into his eyes and, squeezing his hands, I asked, "Ada Let me be by your side until the very end, whenever that may be Will youI heldon in his uess that hat this question was all about I treht that his ansould be no

Chapter Forty-Six

Ada into my hand I tore my eyes away froht, it shone like a tiny star itself and without getting a really close look at it, I knew exactly what it was I’d tried to slip a ring like this on her finger last fall

My jaw tightened "Stand up, E, but her eyes skittered away froed on her ar her shoulders We stood face to face and I stared into her beautiful brown eyes She was biting her lip, convinced that I’d rejected her

"Why are you doing this? Why are you thinking of ether "Because I knohat I want and I don’t want to wait and if I’ve learned anything this year it’s that I’ to deferthis out of a sense of obligation toout of the palm of my hand took her left hand in asped and I had to hold on to her hand or she would have pulled it away in shock

"No, keep it there," I said, finding the correct finger, I slipped the ring on, pushing it past her knuckle It was a perfect fit It was, indeed, the exact saht for her She’d toldat er on her left hand

"E me to become your husband?"

She stood absolutely still and I realized I’d been too scared to look into her face as I asked it And, God, wouldn’t it just be extra huet the same silence for an answer both ti, shining tears trailing down her cheeks She sank onto the sand before me and ere now at eye level I wiped her tears aithbefore, ever I love you One thing I’ve learned in this last year is that this life can really be tough It can throw such utter shit at a person It can take you for an utter fool And I’ve tried to be strong but the thing I’ve learned above all else is that I can’t do this alone And I can’t do it with anyone else…but you…Please…"