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I knew da about it, running the past few hours through h my mind whether I wanted to or not

Why did love hurt so et up and brush sand off his pants Slowly, together but apart, alked back to the house He paused to let lanced up into his eyes Not mirrors Not shutters They were pools of black eht for another breath, h the door up the stairs and intoWe never spoke another word to each other Not even good night

When I closed hts, in the blackness, round and for hours, long after I had any feeling left in ht

And felt And ached

And then went nuht

Adam

I was up all night I didn’t even try to sleep Part of it was spent pacing in my office, another part on my laptop in bed--despite Emilia’s efforts to breakout exactly what I wanted to say to her Despite the eht before, there were plenty of logical facts and reasons for deciding on how to proceed I agonized over theuilt and pretending we couldto deal with it

We were both good at doing that

I didn’t want my words to be delivered from some impersonal email so I instead et across and called it even At six a shoes and went down to work out in the exercise rooetting a drink before going back to do sohts when Emilia came down for breakfast She was fully dressed in jeans and T-shirt, a bandana tied around her head And she was pale, draith dark circles under her eyes

She’d slept about as well as I had, apparently

I was refilling e I took a deep breath and said, "Good"Hey"

"I’d ask how you’re feeling but… well, I think I already know"