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The phone vibrating inIt takes ure out what’s happening I sit up on one elbow and answer it
"Hey, are you okay?" I whisper, my voice full of sleep and air
He doesn’t answer for a second and I think ht call But then he says in a quiet voice, "Jules, I’lance at Rowan and she hasn’t even ?" I turn my face away fro under it
"It’s, well, I had a chance to watch the vision on TV a few times Like fifty, I mean, and it’s--" I can hear the whir of anxiety in his voice notching up He takes a breath "It’s really horrible It almost ertips "Oh, God," I say There are no other words "Are you taking notes? Writing it all down?"
"Yeah Some"
I think I hear a creak of the hallway floor, but it’s nothing I pull the blankets over htness in his throat as he ss hard, hear the air rush from his nostrils into the phone, a tiny blast of eain, and he doesn’t speak, and I know he’s trying to hold it together
"Shit, I reh it is" I cringe, thinking I sound like a condescending jerk hat I really mean to say is, It’s okay to cry with me
It turns out he doesn’t need my permission After a fewinto the caverns ofand re, he blows out a breath and says, "I don’t think I can do this alone"
"You’re not alone, Sawyer" His silence tells me he feels otherwise, and suddenly I’m furious Not at him At my parents, and at his parents And at the ridiculousness of this I can’t see or help rossup on the side of the bed I can hardly contain the surprise tsunaer that floods me "Where are you?"
"In ain, ier than that fear, and the boy across town is more important than the man in the next room
"No I mean yes, of course, obviously But no I’m okay now, and we don’t need any lad" He trails off for a lad you answered And that you’re there"
I can hardly stand it "I’ I can’t take this either I need more than a few minutes at my locker with you" I don’t think I would have said that if it weren’t for the cover of darkness
"Oh, God, Jules," he says, and it sounds like he’s about to break down again "I miss you like you have no idea I know I sound like a basket case, and I’ all over--but this has been the longest week, and everything’s sofucked-up"
"Yeah"