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I stood over the terrariuod The fish hung motionless in its s on the underside of the glass top Getting ready to rain in there I’d grown fond of thiswith the kids, and had added ht red toadstools that popped up in Emelina’s courtyard, and a resurrection fern from the cliff behind my house The terrariu to save little bits of Grace

I slid the glass to one side, hating to disrupt the ecosyste to feed the fish The humid sht of Hallie in the tropics What would she do about these troubles if she were here? Well, stay, for one thing, whereas I wouldn’t I had co the end of the line, maybe in a positive way, but I found I had no clai it as "home" was a hopeful construction, fake, like the terrarium I’d deal with Doc Homer insofar as that was possible in one year, and then I’d rejoin Carlo, or think about another research job; I had no specifics in atives Next year I could be anywhere but here

I’d told Hallie about my bold, ridiculous little deposition on the pH of the river, and a few days later I’d had to folloith the news of the river’s getting da entirely academic I felt hurew up You can’t live through soetting around it" She was aduess I should have more loyalty to et around it A good citizen of the nation in love with forgetting I pelleted the surface of the water with goldfish flakes In nature there are anihty beast Hallie seemed to think I’d crossed over-she claiht to save the coyote pups Ens to save stewing hens In my years of clear recall there was no such picture When Hallie and I lived in Tucson, in the ti the backs of people’s hands and holding their shell-shocked babies I couldn’tI would cross o to bed Later, after my second year of med school, I’d been able to address their external wounds but no ees too, turned out from here like pennies from a pocket Their history would dissolve as families made their separate ways to Tucson or Phoenix, where there were jobs I tried to ihbors all keeping a nervous eye on the color coordination of her flowerbeds Andsed alive by city schools where they’d all learn to walk like Barbara, suffering for their shness It was easy to be tough enough in Grace

Well, at least they’d kno to use condoh life I settled the glass lid back over the terrariuone before the ruination of Grace; I had a one-year contract Now I’d made sure of it

Rita Cardenal called"I don’t think your old man has all his tires on the road"

"It’s possible" I sat down in o on

"Did you tell hi out?"

"Rita, no I wouldn’t do that"

Silence She didn’t believe ures-but at least she’d called "My father and I aren’t real close," I said "I go up to see hinant teen could surely buy that

"Well, then, he’s got a slightly major problem"

"What did he do?"

"He just sorta went imbalanced I went in for my five-mouth checkup? And he said the babies were too little, but he was all kind of nor?" She paused "And then all of a sudden he just loses it and gets all creeped andat me"

"What did he say?"

"Stuff Like, that I had to eat better and he was going to o out of the house till I shaped up It was like he just totally wentto measure my stomach and then he just puts it down and there’s tears in his eyes and he puts his hands on oes, ’We have to talk about this Do you have any idea what’s inside of you?’ I got creeped out"